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raajActually this time I'm not really upset about anything I've written. It's that what I've written isn't yet fitting into a cohesive thing. I can't seem to get a handle on what the driving points for these parts are, and as a result I'm pretty much getting to the point where I can't even make myself write more for it: I tweak stuff, rearrange sections, and... so little is actually properly complete as a scene or transitioning into each other because I don't know what scenes I even want to keep (this is way too long considering no scene in here is actually all the way complete). So yeah, warning, this is seriously messy to read.
Kind of debating just posting the first chapter as its own standalone and leaving the rest, well, alone. I like the idea of the story, it's the telling I can't figure out.
To start off with, HERE IS A BIT I CAN ACTUALLY CONSIDER COMPLETE even if I don't know it'll appear in the final draft of the story. (In fact it almost seems like with a bit of editing it could probably be its own thing as Tifa introspection.)
Cloud tells her, Aerith sent him a dream. That's how he knew she's headed for the City of the Ancients.
It doesn't hurt. Not harshly. The thought just sits there in Tifa's mind, lacking the good grace to know it's long overstayed its welcome.
A dream of peace and a promise. It sounds like something from a fairy tale, a more ethereal romance. It tempts a daydreamer to believe in soulmates—which, to be honest, Tifa never really has before. Cloud was her sweetheart always, her soulmate never. There is a connection, an understanding implied in 'soulmates' that she has never been able to pretend to with the blond, whose blue eyes hide thoughts she can't fathom. Even when they were both kids, he was hard to understand. She remembers that. It's getting harder to remember anything else about their friendship now.
If she had been made to claim anyone on this Planet as her soulmate...she thinks she would have said Aerith, the beautiful woman with hopeful green eyes. They had clicked so quickly, always breaking off from the others to do something together or teaming up when someone stubborn needed convincing, often without words. But--
But Aerith sent Cloud the dream. And for Tifa, there had only been a lie and excuse about why and where she was going out. "Stretching my legs!" Right. Aerith was stretching her legs across two continents.
Tifa understands well enough why she was lied to. Oh, she disagrees with it, but she understands. She would have stopped Aerith, she would have insisted on coming along, and even in the dream (as Cloud says, since she didn't have it) her friend didn't want to be followed. Rationally, it makes sense why Aerith carried things out the way she did, wanting what she did, even if Tifa Lockhart chafes at being kept away. So it doesn't hurt, not harshly.
But it still stings. That she was lied to. That Cloud got a proper explanation in their dream. Heh, "their" dream. If two people can share a dream, they really are connected, aren't they? In a bond that space and distance itself can't stretch out to fray.
Tifa had already known that night in Gold Saucer that she was going to get left behind. Once Aerith had made up her mind to pursue Cloud... Tifa hadn't even been able to choose then, or now, which one she loved more, which one she should confess to, and they'd been drawing ever steadily closer to each other. But to think, she'd been worried about something as ordinary as them kissing, when as it just so happened Aerith could touch Cloud's soul halfway around the world.
Had she ever stood a chance in this little love triangle?
So that's that. And then, backtracking a bit, here is the odds and ends and I swear I just cannot write anything long.
Aerith slept. Tifa didn't, keeping watch over her when she wasn't fretting over Cloud. He was dead to the world; wouldn't wake. But then, it was a near unanimous sentiment to let him take his time on that account. On the other hand Aerith needed to be woken up, every couple of hours, to make sure the concussion wasn't affecting her—it was never easy to tell with those if restorative materia had fully done the job. The smallness of Gongaga's inn meant a short patrol for Tifa as she paced between the two beds opposite each other in the tiny circular room, trying to count down the time and weighing counter impulses between letting Aerith recover from her exhaustion and wanting to make sure she would still wake, as well as to see if she might be able to explain any more of just what had happened in the pit that had been the Temple's foundation. One or two of the other members of their party were always in the inn as well, but the whole nine-man team was simply too big for the establishment, and after some discussion (and arguing, and uncertain looks that had hurt with their aim), they were mostly split up throughout the town. Gathering supplies and trying to figure out their next move, ostensibly.
Playing a waiting game as they wondered if the world might really come to an end.
The first time Aerith was carefully shook awake, she'd immediately spoken Cloud's name as a question, turning her head sharply to try catching sight of him. When she spotted him, the relieved sigh that passed her lips almost hurt to hear. "He's here, yeah," Tifa said needlessly. "We're back in Gongaga."
"He hasn't woken up?"
"No." The concern in Aerith's faint voice was heartening and frustrating all at once. If she was worried for Cloud even now, did she really not blame him? Tifa was glad for that, but she wanted to know why, so everyone could be reassured. …So she could be okay with the fact that Aerith was still bruised and disheveled from an assault that could have killed her, and already forgiving. "Aerith, do you think you can stay awake for a little while? We still don't know what happened down there…what happened to you and Cloud. And the Black Materia is…"
Tifa was already bracing herself as her friend's face grew dark and pinched, upset. The flower girl broke her gaze from their still-sleeping friend to answer: "Sephiroth has it."
A curse floated from the doorway; of course Cid was listening. Vincent surely was too, if more controlled in his reactions. After she'd carried Aerith out of the pit, Barret after her hauling Cloud like a sack of potatoes, Nanaki and Cait Sith had called up that they couldn't find the Black Materia in the pit. Tifa and Barret had each done a quick check of their unconscious passengers, but the materia seemed to have vanished. Immediately the gunman had yelled down demanding if this wasn't another fast one being pulled by Shinra, but Cait Sith was adamant that he'd done nothing fishy in the few minutes he'd been down in the pit—as though Nanaki's sharp eyes and hearing wouldn't have caught him out; they could check him too if they wanted! And it was testament to the tension running through the group that even with everyone aware of how unlikely the possibility was, Vincent actually did check the robot, just to put the nail in that coffin and lay it to rest. The narrow window of circumstance left a short list of suspects, and Sephiroth's name had topped it as the group remembered his strange movements, how he could have slipped past even the most careful watch. Tifa's heart still knotted like a noose to hear it confirmed.
"Then he's going to summon Meteor." And Nanaki's explanation of Sephiroth's plan for that particular spell had been chilling: if there was any truth in it, they were all in big trouble. If it was all true… the world really could come to an end.
"We still have time. He needs the Promised Land…" Aerith drifted off to silence, staring over Tifa's shoulder at what the fighter knew was just the brick wall of the hut; the room's entrance was on her other side.
"Aerith?"
Now she was looking at the door. And then the injured woman was trying to push herself off the bed. Even before her bruises made her stop short with a wince, Tifa was up on her feet, holding one hand out to stop her friend.
"No way. You need to rest."
"But, the Planet—"
"You said we still have time, right? So take a rest. You could tell me what it's saying." Not that Tifa really knew what to make of talking to the Planet; the only spirits she'd ever worked with were the alcoholic kind. But it was evident Aerith had talked to something in the temple…and even if she was the only who could hear it, that didn't mean others couldn't help her do whatever was needed, right?
There was so much tension knotted up in the brawler's limbs. She would have raced out and done just about anything, anything the Planet could ask, if it would fix this situation. If it would guarantee Cloud's eyes opening with clarity and calm, if it would mean Aerith could rest, if it would make everyone safe.
"I… I don't know. It's not clear," the Ancient admitted falteringly, sinking the hope of such a simple fix.
Tifa let out a slow breath. "Then we can't do anything yet. We need some sort of plan."
She had the strength to be firm, especially when the other woman's eyes were still murky with exhaustion; if Aerith wouldn't worry about herself, someone needed to. In the end the woman agreed to lie back down, 'for a little bit', and almost immediately slipped back into sleep. Tifa adjusted the pillow under the woman's head and fretted with the edges of her blanket, as her hands lacked anything better to do.
Cid summed up the situation: "Well, fuck!"
Cloud continued to sleep, and Tifa wondered, as she seemed to have countless times since finding him, what exactly was on his mind. Had he fully realized the trouble they were now in? Was that why had he snapped?
There still wasn't anything they could do, and it was starting to drive her mad.
Hours passed before Aerith was woken up again. The exhaustion in her eyes had turned into sadness. "Everyone's hurting."
That hit a little too close to home with how tense the group was, and Tifa shook her head. "What do you mean?"
"…Screaming…"
Tifa pursed her lips, sitting down by the side of the bed. Obviously her friend hadn't gotten the hoped-for restful sleep. "...Nanaki never heard Cloud scream."
"Ah?" Aerith's eyes flicked up to the ceiling without focusing on it. "...Oh." Her hands clasped gently under her chest, beginning to rise and fall with her breath. She closed her eyes for just a few seconds, and by the time Tifa recognized she might be praying--it was a gesture seen so rarely nowadays--her eyes were already open again. "No. I suppose he wouldn't have."
"I don't get it. What does that even mean? You were just hearing the Planet? But you sounded so sure he was hurt," Tifa blurted out, and almost winced at her pleading. But Aerith probably understood. She was concerned for Cloud too.
"I know what Cloud sounds like," Aerith said. Her voice was firm. "I've been listening, and watching, for him. For a while now. But I didn't know what to make of it."
Paying attention to Cloud? Tifa wasn't surprised, not after that night at the Gold Saucer, but that sting of petty jealousy was so slight at the moment. "Didn't know what to make of it?"
The other woman actually looked timid for a split-second, like she wanted to swallow back the very words she was clearly mulling over. "I thought... you would have said if something was really wrong with Cloud. You know him best of all of us."
For a moment, Tifa didn't react at all, her face slack at the unexpected statement. Aerith saw something wrong with Cloud too? So it wasn't just her... and then her cheeks colored at the implication she should have said something. And what would she have said? All she would have done was cast doubt on Cloud when she wasn't even sure he was the one wrong.
But any anger Tifa felt over the issue was pierced by the reality of where they were and where she'd wanted to be. Aerith herself had been laid up in bed by whatever was wrong with Cloud, and he was unconscious. Everyone was worried, even if they wouldn't show it. Would things be different if she'd said there was something off...? Tifa really had wanted to confide in someone all along. She'd wanted to confide in Aerith, she'd thought about it herself so many times, but the occasion had never been right.
No...she'd just never stopped being scared that the moment she admitted doubt in Cloud, she'd lose him again.
Aerith took in her silence and slowly nodded. "It's all right, Tifa. I could have said something too. It's pretty complicated, I guess... no, I know it is."
**
It was late in the night now since they'd gotten back from the temple. Tifa's body was already tired from travel and the scant sleep from the night before. She tried sitting down but the hard floors of the Gongaga Inn borne from poverty in the village made uncomfortable seating, little chance of resting on them. She found herself staring enviously at the beds. It was...those were the only way she could rest and be by Aerith and Cloud. Surely Aerith would not begrudge sharing the bed, right? Even after thinking it, and convincing herself of the truth of that thought, it still took Tifa a whole ten minutes to creep into the bed. She halted when Aerith's dark green eyes opened at her, but before she could apologize she realized there was no confusion or objection in them.
Aerith's hand lighted on her arm and tugged insistently. Tifa had to shift more and more into the bed, lying down beside her friend who curled in to nestle close. The girl's eyes were already closing again, but still Tifa wrapped one protective arm over her.
"It'll be all right," Tifa said quietly. "We're strong. We can get through this." Words she needed someone to say to her, words she knew Aerith needed to hear herself. It had to hurt, hearing the screams of a Planet. The screams of a friend as he was forced to betray. But Aerith was strong, stronger than her, smiling so often when there was little reason to. And she would shield Aerith, as much as possible.
She curled into Aerith, her head resting against the other girl's collarbone, thinking Aerith must be able to feel the lie of false confidence when she had to resist the urge to cling for dear life.
After a peaceful sleep that was too brief, that resistance failed when she felt the other woman pulling out from beneath her grasp; stuck between Tifa and the wall on each side, Aerith had decided instead to scoot downward along the bed and ease herself off its foot, slipping from beneath Tifa's arm. But Tifa's fingers tightened on her before the woman was fully out. "Aerith? Where are you going?"
"For a walk," Aerith said. "How long have I been asleep? It was much too long."
"No it wasn't. It was only..." Tifa was the one muddled by sleep now; she could tell Aerith how long she'd been asleep before being joined on the bed, but she had no idea of any track of time after that--the windowless state of the room definitely didn't help with that. She was so exhausted, her body's clock thoroughly out of sync, that it could have been morning, midnight, afternoon, how would she know?
She'd see outside. They were going on a walk. She pushed herself upright, trying to blink sleep from her eyes, but before she could swing up onto her feet there was a hand at her shoulder.
"Oh, Tifa. What are you doing?"
"I'll go with..."
"You've been watching over us this whole time, haven't you? You look so exhausted I feel like yawning all over again looking at you. Let yourself rest, Tifa."
Sleep did sound good. Really, really good—especially when the mere mention of yawning was suggestive enough for her traitorous mouth to do just that as soon as she opened it. "D...don't...go far. Everyone's been worried about you."
"I'll be back soon."
Tifa nodded, accepting her friend's word; though rather than lay back down, she dragged a bit of the blanket around her shoulders, feeling its extra warmth from body heat, and tracked Aerith blearily as she passed Yuffie with a smile and a blithe remark about needing to stretch her legs. She...did seem okay on her feet. Direct, not disoriented. So her concussion was truly healed then, a blessed reassurance. And she'd be back soon. Tifa wanted to wait for her to come back, but all too soon exhaustion pulled the caretaker back down into a blank, silent sleep.
"Tifa."
The body heat had dissipated. There was cold metal on her shoulder that made her fidget until realizing it was Vincent's metal claw resting on her, and then she jumped again because Vincent was never inclined to disturb others except for watch duty. "Wha, wha--is it my turn?" Were they taking turns here? She hadn't even thought to ask before.
Vincent ignored the question for the sleep-addled nonsense it was, instead crouching down slightly in front of the bed to meet her eyes. "Did Aerith tell you where she would be?"
"Out for a walk…she should be back soon."
His pale face was impassive. "She told Yuffie the same, but her 'walk' has been nearly four hours now."
Oh, God. She hadn't been well after all; she was probably collapsed in a faint somewhere. "We have to look for her—"
"We began searching two hours ago. She's not in the village," the former Turk summed up precisely, and Tifa felt both foolish and more frightened. Of course the others would have realized before now that something was wrong. Aerith could be easily distracted during her ventures, talk with locals turning "fifteen minutes" into "an hour" when the group was resting somewhere, but she was reliable when things got serious. Right now, they were dire. "We've begun sweeping the jungle… but it seemed prudent to check if she had said any more to you."
"No. She said she'd be right back… I don't understand. What could have happened?" The blanket's fabric became security as Tifa clutched it closer to her shoulders. "…We shouldn't have stopped here. Not after the last time. If Shinra took her—do you think she could have been?"
She was worrying now, openly fretting, and anyone else probably would have told her to calm down. At the moment, she was glad Vincent was the way he was, and willing to consider such possibilities. It still only took him a few seconds to shake his head. "There would have been a struggle. No one has seen or heard any evidence of that. I would say, more than likely… she's left of her own accord. Perhaps she finally made out what the Planet was telling her."
"You believe her, don't you, Vincent?"
"I've seen too much to be skeptical of such a claim." He straightened up. "We'll keep looking."
Tifa gritted her teeth, her hands folding up into fists. Damn it, why had her friend lied to her?! She wouldn't have stopped Aerith from going; she would have gone with, and kept an eye on her... someone else could watch Cloud, he was just sleeping, and he'd probably be okay, he hadn't even been injured, concerning as the assault on Aerith was.
**
When Cloud let out a soft moan, Tifa stopped still in her tracks, turning to him. Barret was also sharp at attention--enough to catch Tifa by the shoulder when the moaning continued and she started to approach Cloud, to wake him from the apparent nightmare.
Remembering what had happened when she'd shared a tent with Cloud near this town, she was glad for Barret's mindfulness. It was much too likely that he'd come back swinging, just as he'd gone out. It was already obvious as his jaw clenched and his fingers twitched that he was struggling against the dream.
"No...no! Come back!"
The next moment, Cloud's eyes opened, and they focused narrowly on Barret and Tifa. Clarity and calm were what she'd hoped would grace his expression, but he was wild-eyed and face twisted up, looking horrified.
He was aware, though. It was apparent by just how quickly his face settled again into something more controlled, even if his eyes still betrayed upset.
"You looked like you was havin' a nightmare," Barret told him. "How are you feeling?"
The first look Cloud gave him could easily have been interpreted as 'no shit', flat as it was. But the question seemed to be the final push he needed to get himself fully back to normal, blinking the last remnants of a restless sleep away: "...I seem to be okay now."
"That's good. For a while there I wasn't sure how things were going."
What were they talking like this for? Tifa knew Cloud, she knew Barret knew him--he wasn't going to spill his heart over a nightmare. "Cloud, Aerith is missing."
So they had to go now. He was awake, he was aware, he was probably shook up about what had happened because they all had been but for god's sake, Aerith was missing. She could be killed. They had to find her straight away.
She wasn't expecting Cloud to actually know where Aerith was.
"...City of the Ancients. Aerith is headed there."
That--sounded familiar, though Tifa couldn't quite place it. The answer sure got Barret in a fury, though, and Tifa immediately guessed: it was far, dangeous, or both. Well, it wasn't like the Temple of the Ancients had been easily accessible either.
"By herself?! Why'd she go by herself? Hey, we're going, too."
"Only the Ancients, only Aerith can save us from Meteor..."
"Then we MUST go," Tifa said, growing nervous. Cloud didn't sound like himself. Because really, any time Aerith was in danger or doing something that might be dangerous, he was there to be overly sensible. Sometimes annoyingly so, depending on how he phrased his objection. "What'll we do if something happens to Aerith? If Sephiroth finds her, she's in trouble."
Cloud didn't exactly freeze on the bed; he hadn't been moving in the first place. But movement became even more unlikely in that moment, with his eyes staying fastened toward the ground. "Sephiroth... already knows."
"Hey! Why are you still sitting around?" Barret demanded.
Exactly what Tifa had wanted to say, so she didn't reiterate it, upset as she was. They just needed to get moving. Before Aerith was taken from them. "Let's go, Cloud."
Something inside her crumpled when he did, folding in on himself on the bed and cradling his head like it could break. "No… I'm afraid. If this keeps up, I might go crazy! I'm afraid…"
Afraid he might be the one to hurt her? Was he really that unstable?
**
The point where it gets EVEN MESSIER TO READ because haha writing:
Cloud wanted to be by Tifa, as much as he wanted to be by anyone at all. He still didn't have a good explanation for his actions in the pit of the once Temple and it scared him. He'd wanted Aerith to--tell me who I am--but she hadn't, couldn't. She had to go save the world. That sense of goodness that radiated from her eyes, like they were reflecting something only she could perceive in him, quickly vanished. It had felt like there was no way he could do anything for her.
Tifa and Barret had quickly raged at him, promises of knocks upside the head and quiet pleas that they must go save Aerith getting him back up on his feet, and once there... yeah, he was annoyed with himself too. He had been a SOLDIER. He wasn't going to fail her by doing nothing.
Still...it...scared him, the moment the world had slipped out of focus and he had practically been outside his body, watching himself hand over the materia. He'd screamed at himself, tried to hold his own body back, but in the end nothing had worked; the materia had been handed over to Sephiroth.
And then... then...
He'd beaten Aerith. Tifa had told him, with a pinched, unhappy face, that that was the reason he now had jagged claw marks over the back of his left shoulder: he'd been beating Aerith, and after Nanaki had failed to get any response by yelling at him the feline had pounced on him to bring him to the ground.
Cloud barely remembered any yelling under the heavy tinnitus ringing not in his ears but in his head; but Tifa was honest. So the only thing to do had been thank Nanaki--quickly, without fuss, but it needed to be said.
'You did the right thing. If I'm a threat, take me out.'
Nanaki's actions, Barret's words...yes, he knew he could trust in his party if he went wild. But...
But he wasn't really sure...if a second time would find him coming back to normal. It felt like he was unraveling, and badly. It scared him. Like he was weaving offstep--he just didn't want to go crazy like that again.
So...so he was gravitating to Tifa. Even though she was looking away from him. It's because he's letting down her best friend. He understands that, so he's not angry, but he's just... something inside him is aching. He needed Aerith to tell him who he was, but she wouldn't. And Tifa's always, always had the answers, always been willing to take care of people, so maybe she would--if he could just get her to look at him.
What he does is sit down on the bed at the same moment she does. Their backs bump into each other and she sucks a breath in, jerking back up. "Cloud--"
Barret is giving him a look that promises so much shit if he even breathes on her wrong, but the man soon looks away. Cloud's not sure if it's because Barret knows him better than that now, or if he knows Tifa would kick his ass herself if it needed beating, or if his face is saying too much about how he feels.
It'd be just perfect if his face is saying too much when he can't even get his mouth to work.
"I wanted to talk to you," he murmurs to Tifa.
**
((...Also that is like three different attempts at that scene spliced together just now. So pretty much everything I've done with this fic lately was just "Oh, I think I have an idea. No, I don't know how to make the idea work. Let's try this. Now I'm frustrated. Let's try something else. LET'S GO BACK TO THIS...))
**
Her fingers twitched before clasping around cloud's bicep. "Cloud."
He looked at her with confusion. She knew her request was one that would throw him for a loop.
"Let me go up to Aerith first," she whispered. Because she could protect Aerith too, because she wanted to. She wanted to protect Cloud.
He nodded, though with uncertainty in his eyes, and she strode toward the first pillar and took a short leap up to it. She wondered if originally they'd been closer, or had more pillars in between--they weren't level but slightly crooked beneath her feet, leading to the guess that they'd been disturbed at one point.
And yet, still, she passed with little enough noise. Aerith did not stir one bit, which made Tifa grit her teeth. They had been so worried about her... shouldn't she at least acknowledge them? But the woman continued to keep her head bowed, hands clasped.
...Perhaps, then, she was communicating to someone. Probably the Planet. After sharing dreams with Cloud, Aerith wouldn't exactly be pulling a surprise by communicating to the Planet by prayer. So this was what she'd left them behind for.
A cut-off sound pulled her attention back for just a moment. Cloud had started toward the pillar, only for Barret to immediately grab his shoulder. He wanted to see Aerith, so it shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone...but it seemed to be a surprise to himself. His eyes were a touch wide, mouth working fruitlessly for a second before he closed it and shook his head.
Tifa wasn't sure if she wanted to know, not when they were so close to having Aerith back, so she crossed the final pillar into the threshold of the altar.
Aerith was still in prayer. Tifa wanted to shake her out of it and one hand rose to do that, but she just--couldn't. Aerith had come here to pray, so she needed to do that, obviously. She was the one saving the world, and just watching her... Tifa wasn't sure if it was the angle of her brow or the curve of her shoulders in prayer, but somehow she could see Aerith was pouring her whole heart into that.
Finally, green eyes opened, and Aerith immediately smiled at Tifa. It was the warmth of that gesture and the sure sign of hope behind it--Aerith was done praying and she was happy, it must mean something good--that let the tension ease out of the brawler's muscles, even as she caught herself and resolved that she wanted to tell the other woman how she felt about that little vanishing trick back in Gongaga.
"Aerith, we were so worried--"
In the glass surrounding them, there was a single flicker: a shadow, where there should only have been light.
It was enough for Tifa to shove Aerith back. And that was enough to place her in the path of a blade she recognized all too well when it sliced through her stomach from front to back.
Masamune. Seeing it embedded into her flesh once again felt unreal, but she was already struggling to pull in breath. Not a dream then, not a nightmare.
This...this was something she might never wake up from.
IN CONCLUSION: I think I am pretty much going about this chapter all wrong and am just now contemplating doing the final chapter as a sort of round of sleeping scenes...especially since I for some reason want to write about Aerith in the Sleeping Forest on her own. Even though no one else is with her \o_o/ I have pretty much hit the wall for a while now on knowing what I want to do with this.
Kind of debating just posting the first chapter as its own standalone and leaving the rest, well, alone. I like the idea of the story, it's the telling I can't figure out.
To start off with, HERE IS A BIT I CAN ACTUALLY CONSIDER COMPLETE even if I don't know it'll appear in the final draft of the story. (In fact it almost seems like with a bit of editing it could probably be its own thing as Tifa introspection.)
Cloud tells her, Aerith sent him a dream. That's how he knew she's headed for the City of the Ancients.
It doesn't hurt. Not harshly. The thought just sits there in Tifa's mind, lacking the good grace to know it's long overstayed its welcome.
A dream of peace and a promise. It sounds like something from a fairy tale, a more ethereal romance. It tempts a daydreamer to believe in soulmates—which, to be honest, Tifa never really has before. Cloud was her sweetheart always, her soulmate never. There is a connection, an understanding implied in 'soulmates' that she has never been able to pretend to with the blond, whose blue eyes hide thoughts she can't fathom. Even when they were both kids, he was hard to understand. She remembers that. It's getting harder to remember anything else about their friendship now.
If she had been made to claim anyone on this Planet as her soulmate...she thinks she would have said Aerith, the beautiful woman with hopeful green eyes. They had clicked so quickly, always breaking off from the others to do something together or teaming up when someone stubborn needed convincing, often without words. But--
But Aerith sent Cloud the dream. And for Tifa, there had only been a lie and excuse about why and where she was going out. "Stretching my legs!" Right. Aerith was stretching her legs across two continents.
Tifa understands well enough why she was lied to. Oh, she disagrees with it, but she understands. She would have stopped Aerith, she would have insisted on coming along, and even in the dream (as Cloud says, since she didn't have it) her friend didn't want to be followed. Rationally, it makes sense why Aerith carried things out the way she did, wanting what she did, even if Tifa Lockhart chafes at being kept away. So it doesn't hurt, not harshly.
But it still stings. That she was lied to. That Cloud got a proper explanation in their dream. Heh, "their" dream. If two people can share a dream, they really are connected, aren't they? In a bond that space and distance itself can't stretch out to fray.
Tifa had already known that night in Gold Saucer that she was going to get left behind. Once Aerith had made up her mind to pursue Cloud... Tifa hadn't even been able to choose then, or now, which one she loved more, which one she should confess to, and they'd been drawing ever steadily closer to each other. But to think, she'd been worried about something as ordinary as them kissing, when as it just so happened Aerith could touch Cloud's soul halfway around the world.
Had she ever stood a chance in this little love triangle?
So that's that. And then, backtracking a bit, here is the odds and ends and I swear I just cannot write anything long.
Aerith slept. Tifa didn't, keeping watch over her when she wasn't fretting over Cloud. He was dead to the world; wouldn't wake. But then, it was a near unanimous sentiment to let him take his time on that account. On the other hand Aerith needed to be woken up, every couple of hours, to make sure the concussion wasn't affecting her—it was never easy to tell with those if restorative materia had fully done the job. The smallness of Gongaga's inn meant a short patrol for Tifa as she paced between the two beds opposite each other in the tiny circular room, trying to count down the time and weighing counter impulses between letting Aerith recover from her exhaustion and wanting to make sure she would still wake, as well as to see if she might be able to explain any more of just what had happened in the pit that had been the Temple's foundation. One or two of the other members of their party were always in the inn as well, but the whole nine-man team was simply too big for the establishment, and after some discussion (and arguing, and uncertain looks that had hurt with their aim), they were mostly split up throughout the town. Gathering supplies and trying to figure out their next move, ostensibly.
Playing a waiting game as they wondered if the world might really come to an end.
The first time Aerith was carefully shook awake, she'd immediately spoken Cloud's name as a question, turning her head sharply to try catching sight of him. When she spotted him, the relieved sigh that passed her lips almost hurt to hear. "He's here, yeah," Tifa said needlessly. "We're back in Gongaga."
"He hasn't woken up?"
"No." The concern in Aerith's faint voice was heartening and frustrating all at once. If she was worried for Cloud even now, did she really not blame him? Tifa was glad for that, but she wanted to know why, so everyone could be reassured. …So she could be okay with the fact that Aerith was still bruised and disheveled from an assault that could have killed her, and already forgiving. "Aerith, do you think you can stay awake for a little while? We still don't know what happened down there…what happened to you and Cloud. And the Black Materia is…"
Tifa was already bracing herself as her friend's face grew dark and pinched, upset. The flower girl broke her gaze from their still-sleeping friend to answer: "Sephiroth has it."
A curse floated from the doorway; of course Cid was listening. Vincent surely was too, if more controlled in his reactions. After she'd carried Aerith out of the pit, Barret after her hauling Cloud like a sack of potatoes, Nanaki and Cait Sith had called up that they couldn't find the Black Materia in the pit. Tifa and Barret had each done a quick check of their unconscious passengers, but the materia seemed to have vanished. Immediately the gunman had yelled down demanding if this wasn't another fast one being pulled by Shinra, but Cait Sith was adamant that he'd done nothing fishy in the few minutes he'd been down in the pit—as though Nanaki's sharp eyes and hearing wouldn't have caught him out; they could check him too if they wanted! And it was testament to the tension running through the group that even with everyone aware of how unlikely the possibility was, Vincent actually did check the robot, just to put the nail in that coffin and lay it to rest. The narrow window of circumstance left a short list of suspects, and Sephiroth's name had topped it as the group remembered his strange movements, how he could have slipped past even the most careful watch. Tifa's heart still knotted like a noose to hear it confirmed.
"Then he's going to summon Meteor." And Nanaki's explanation of Sephiroth's plan for that particular spell had been chilling: if there was any truth in it, they were all in big trouble. If it was all true… the world really could come to an end.
"We still have time. He needs the Promised Land…" Aerith drifted off to silence, staring over Tifa's shoulder at what the fighter knew was just the brick wall of the hut; the room's entrance was on her other side.
"Aerith?"
Now she was looking at the door. And then the injured woman was trying to push herself off the bed. Even before her bruises made her stop short with a wince, Tifa was up on her feet, holding one hand out to stop her friend.
"No way. You need to rest."
"But, the Planet—"
"You said we still have time, right? So take a rest. You could tell me what it's saying." Not that Tifa really knew what to make of talking to the Planet; the only spirits she'd ever worked with were the alcoholic kind. But it was evident Aerith had talked to something in the temple…and even if she was the only who could hear it, that didn't mean others couldn't help her do whatever was needed, right?
There was so much tension knotted up in the brawler's limbs. She would have raced out and done just about anything, anything the Planet could ask, if it would fix this situation. If it would guarantee Cloud's eyes opening with clarity and calm, if it would mean Aerith could rest, if it would make everyone safe.
"I… I don't know. It's not clear," the Ancient admitted falteringly, sinking the hope of such a simple fix.
Tifa let out a slow breath. "Then we can't do anything yet. We need some sort of plan."
She had the strength to be firm, especially when the other woman's eyes were still murky with exhaustion; if Aerith wouldn't worry about herself, someone needed to. In the end the woman agreed to lie back down, 'for a little bit', and almost immediately slipped back into sleep. Tifa adjusted the pillow under the woman's head and fretted with the edges of her blanket, as her hands lacked anything better to do.
Cid summed up the situation: "Well, fuck!"
Cloud continued to sleep, and Tifa wondered, as she seemed to have countless times since finding him, what exactly was on his mind. Had he fully realized the trouble they were now in? Was that why had he snapped?
There still wasn't anything they could do, and it was starting to drive her mad.
Hours passed before Aerith was woken up again. The exhaustion in her eyes had turned into sadness. "Everyone's hurting."
That hit a little too close to home with how tense the group was, and Tifa shook her head. "What do you mean?"
"…Screaming…"
Tifa pursed her lips, sitting down by the side of the bed. Obviously her friend hadn't gotten the hoped-for restful sleep. "...Nanaki never heard Cloud scream."
"Ah?" Aerith's eyes flicked up to the ceiling without focusing on it. "...Oh." Her hands clasped gently under her chest, beginning to rise and fall with her breath. She closed her eyes for just a few seconds, and by the time Tifa recognized she might be praying--it was a gesture seen so rarely nowadays--her eyes were already open again. "No. I suppose he wouldn't have."
"I don't get it. What does that even mean? You were just hearing the Planet? But you sounded so sure he was hurt," Tifa blurted out, and almost winced at her pleading. But Aerith probably understood. She was concerned for Cloud too.
"I know what Cloud sounds like," Aerith said. Her voice was firm. "I've been listening, and watching, for him. For a while now. But I didn't know what to make of it."
Paying attention to Cloud? Tifa wasn't surprised, not after that night at the Gold Saucer, but that sting of petty jealousy was so slight at the moment. "Didn't know what to make of it?"
The other woman actually looked timid for a split-second, like she wanted to swallow back the very words she was clearly mulling over. "I thought... you would have said if something was really wrong with Cloud. You know him best of all of us."
For a moment, Tifa didn't react at all, her face slack at the unexpected statement. Aerith saw something wrong with Cloud too? So it wasn't just her... and then her cheeks colored at the implication she should have said something. And what would she have said? All she would have done was cast doubt on Cloud when she wasn't even sure he was the one wrong.
But any anger Tifa felt over the issue was pierced by the reality of where they were and where she'd wanted to be. Aerith herself had been laid up in bed by whatever was wrong with Cloud, and he was unconscious. Everyone was worried, even if they wouldn't show it. Would things be different if she'd said there was something off...? Tifa really had wanted to confide in someone all along. She'd wanted to confide in Aerith, she'd thought about it herself so many times, but the occasion had never been right.
No...she'd just never stopped being scared that the moment she admitted doubt in Cloud, she'd lose him again.
Aerith took in her silence and slowly nodded. "It's all right, Tifa. I could have said something too. It's pretty complicated, I guess... no, I know it is."
**
It was late in the night now since they'd gotten back from the temple. Tifa's body was already tired from travel and the scant sleep from the night before. She tried sitting down but the hard floors of the Gongaga Inn borne from poverty in the village made uncomfortable seating, little chance of resting on them. She found herself staring enviously at the beds. It was...those were the only way she could rest and be by Aerith and Cloud. Surely Aerith would not begrudge sharing the bed, right? Even after thinking it, and convincing herself of the truth of that thought, it still took Tifa a whole ten minutes to creep into the bed. She halted when Aerith's dark green eyes opened at her, but before she could apologize she realized there was no confusion or objection in them.
Aerith's hand lighted on her arm and tugged insistently. Tifa had to shift more and more into the bed, lying down beside her friend who curled in to nestle close. The girl's eyes were already closing again, but still Tifa wrapped one protective arm over her.
"It'll be all right," Tifa said quietly. "We're strong. We can get through this." Words she needed someone to say to her, words she knew Aerith needed to hear herself. It had to hurt, hearing the screams of a Planet. The screams of a friend as he was forced to betray. But Aerith was strong, stronger than her, smiling so often when there was little reason to. And she would shield Aerith, as much as possible.
She curled into Aerith, her head resting against the other girl's collarbone, thinking Aerith must be able to feel the lie of false confidence when she had to resist the urge to cling for dear life.
After a peaceful sleep that was too brief, that resistance failed when she felt the other woman pulling out from beneath her grasp; stuck between Tifa and the wall on each side, Aerith had decided instead to scoot downward along the bed and ease herself off its foot, slipping from beneath Tifa's arm. But Tifa's fingers tightened on her before the woman was fully out. "Aerith? Where are you going?"
"For a walk," Aerith said. "How long have I been asleep? It was much too long."
"No it wasn't. It was only..." Tifa was the one muddled by sleep now; she could tell Aerith how long she'd been asleep before being joined on the bed, but she had no idea of any track of time after that--the windowless state of the room definitely didn't help with that. She was so exhausted, her body's clock thoroughly out of sync, that it could have been morning, midnight, afternoon, how would she know?
She'd see outside. They were going on a walk. She pushed herself upright, trying to blink sleep from her eyes, but before she could swing up onto her feet there was a hand at her shoulder.
"Oh, Tifa. What are you doing?"
"I'll go with..."
"You've been watching over us this whole time, haven't you? You look so exhausted I feel like yawning all over again looking at you. Let yourself rest, Tifa."
Sleep did sound good. Really, really good—especially when the mere mention of yawning was suggestive enough for her traitorous mouth to do just that as soon as she opened it. "D...don't...go far. Everyone's been worried about you."
"I'll be back soon."
Tifa nodded, accepting her friend's word; though rather than lay back down, she dragged a bit of the blanket around her shoulders, feeling its extra warmth from body heat, and tracked Aerith blearily as she passed Yuffie with a smile and a blithe remark about needing to stretch her legs. She...did seem okay on her feet. Direct, not disoriented. So her concussion was truly healed then, a blessed reassurance. And she'd be back soon. Tifa wanted to wait for her to come back, but all too soon exhaustion pulled the caretaker back down into a blank, silent sleep.
"Tifa."
The body heat had dissipated. There was cold metal on her shoulder that made her fidget until realizing it was Vincent's metal claw resting on her, and then she jumped again because Vincent was never inclined to disturb others except for watch duty. "Wha, wha--is it my turn?" Were they taking turns here? She hadn't even thought to ask before.
Vincent ignored the question for the sleep-addled nonsense it was, instead crouching down slightly in front of the bed to meet her eyes. "Did Aerith tell you where she would be?"
"Out for a walk…she should be back soon."
His pale face was impassive. "She told Yuffie the same, but her 'walk' has been nearly four hours now."
Oh, God. She hadn't been well after all; she was probably collapsed in a faint somewhere. "We have to look for her—"
"We began searching two hours ago. She's not in the village," the former Turk summed up precisely, and Tifa felt both foolish and more frightened. Of course the others would have realized before now that something was wrong. Aerith could be easily distracted during her ventures, talk with locals turning "fifteen minutes" into "an hour" when the group was resting somewhere, but she was reliable when things got serious. Right now, they were dire. "We've begun sweeping the jungle… but it seemed prudent to check if she had said any more to you."
"No. She said she'd be right back… I don't understand. What could have happened?" The blanket's fabric became security as Tifa clutched it closer to her shoulders. "…We shouldn't have stopped here. Not after the last time. If Shinra took her—do you think she could have been?"
She was worrying now, openly fretting, and anyone else probably would have told her to calm down. At the moment, she was glad Vincent was the way he was, and willing to consider such possibilities. It still only took him a few seconds to shake his head. "There would have been a struggle. No one has seen or heard any evidence of that. I would say, more than likely… she's left of her own accord. Perhaps she finally made out what the Planet was telling her."
"You believe her, don't you, Vincent?"
"I've seen too much to be skeptical of such a claim." He straightened up. "We'll keep looking."
Tifa gritted her teeth, her hands folding up into fists. Damn it, why had her friend lied to her?! She wouldn't have stopped Aerith from going; she would have gone with, and kept an eye on her... someone else could watch Cloud, he was just sleeping, and he'd probably be okay, he hadn't even been injured, concerning as the assault on Aerith was.
**
When Cloud let out a soft moan, Tifa stopped still in her tracks, turning to him. Barret was also sharp at attention--enough to catch Tifa by the shoulder when the moaning continued and she started to approach Cloud, to wake him from the apparent nightmare.
Remembering what had happened when she'd shared a tent with Cloud near this town, she was glad for Barret's mindfulness. It was much too likely that he'd come back swinging, just as he'd gone out. It was already obvious as his jaw clenched and his fingers twitched that he was struggling against the dream.
"No...no! Come back!"
The next moment, Cloud's eyes opened, and they focused narrowly on Barret and Tifa. Clarity and calm were what she'd hoped would grace his expression, but he was wild-eyed and face twisted up, looking horrified.
He was aware, though. It was apparent by just how quickly his face settled again into something more controlled, even if his eyes still betrayed upset.
"You looked like you was havin' a nightmare," Barret told him. "How are you feeling?"
The first look Cloud gave him could easily have been interpreted as 'no shit', flat as it was. But the question seemed to be the final push he needed to get himself fully back to normal, blinking the last remnants of a restless sleep away: "...I seem to be okay now."
"That's good. For a while there I wasn't sure how things were going."
What were they talking like this for? Tifa knew Cloud, she knew Barret knew him--he wasn't going to spill his heart over a nightmare. "Cloud, Aerith is missing."
So they had to go now. He was awake, he was aware, he was probably shook up about what had happened because they all had been but for god's sake, Aerith was missing. She could be killed. They had to find her straight away.
She wasn't expecting Cloud to actually know where Aerith was.
"...City of the Ancients. Aerith is headed there."
That--sounded familiar, though Tifa couldn't quite place it. The answer sure got Barret in a fury, though, and Tifa immediately guessed: it was far, dangeous, or both. Well, it wasn't like the Temple of the Ancients had been easily accessible either.
"By herself?! Why'd she go by herself? Hey, we're going, too."
"Only the Ancients, only Aerith can save us from Meteor..."
"Then we MUST go," Tifa said, growing nervous. Cloud didn't sound like himself. Because really, any time Aerith was in danger or doing something that might be dangerous, he was there to be overly sensible. Sometimes annoyingly so, depending on how he phrased his objection. "What'll we do if something happens to Aerith? If Sephiroth finds her, she's in trouble."
Cloud didn't exactly freeze on the bed; he hadn't been moving in the first place. But movement became even more unlikely in that moment, with his eyes staying fastened toward the ground. "Sephiroth... already knows."
"Hey! Why are you still sitting around?" Barret demanded.
Exactly what Tifa had wanted to say, so she didn't reiterate it, upset as she was. They just needed to get moving. Before Aerith was taken from them. "Let's go, Cloud."
Something inside her crumpled when he did, folding in on himself on the bed and cradling his head like it could break. "No… I'm afraid. If this keeps up, I might go crazy! I'm afraid…"
Afraid he might be the one to hurt her? Was he really that unstable?
**
The point where it gets EVEN MESSIER TO READ because haha writing:
Cloud wanted to be by Tifa, as much as he wanted to be by anyone at all. He still didn't have a good explanation for his actions in the pit of the once Temple and it scared him. He'd wanted Aerith to--tell me who I am--but she hadn't, couldn't. She had to go save the world. That sense of goodness that radiated from her eyes, like they were reflecting something only she could perceive in him, quickly vanished. It had felt like there was no way he could do anything for her.
Tifa and Barret had quickly raged at him, promises of knocks upside the head and quiet pleas that they must go save Aerith getting him back up on his feet, and once there... yeah, he was annoyed with himself too. He had been a SOLDIER. He wasn't going to fail her by doing nothing.
Still...it...scared him, the moment the world had slipped out of focus and he had practically been outside his body, watching himself hand over the materia. He'd screamed at himself, tried to hold his own body back, but in the end nothing had worked; the materia had been handed over to Sephiroth.
And then... then...
He'd beaten Aerith. Tifa had told him, with a pinched, unhappy face, that that was the reason he now had jagged claw marks over the back of his left shoulder: he'd been beating Aerith, and after Nanaki had failed to get any response by yelling at him the feline had pounced on him to bring him to the ground.
Cloud barely remembered any yelling under the heavy tinnitus ringing not in his ears but in his head; but Tifa was honest. So the only thing to do had been thank Nanaki--quickly, without fuss, but it needed to be said.
'You did the right thing. If I'm a threat, take me out.'
Nanaki's actions, Barret's words...yes, he knew he could trust in his party if he went wild. But...
But he wasn't really sure...if a second time would find him coming back to normal. It felt like he was unraveling, and badly. It scared him. Like he was weaving offstep--he just didn't want to go crazy like that again.
So...so he was gravitating to Tifa. Even though she was looking away from him. It's because he's letting down her best friend. He understands that, so he's not angry, but he's just... something inside him is aching. He needed Aerith to tell him who he was, but she wouldn't. And Tifa's always, always had the answers, always been willing to take care of people, so maybe she would--if he could just get her to look at him.
What he does is sit down on the bed at the same moment she does. Their backs bump into each other and she sucks a breath in, jerking back up. "Cloud--"
Barret is giving him a look that promises so much shit if he even breathes on her wrong, but the man soon looks away. Cloud's not sure if it's because Barret knows him better than that now, or if he knows Tifa would kick his ass herself if it needed beating, or if his face is saying too much about how he feels.
It'd be just perfect if his face is saying too much when he can't even get his mouth to work.
"I wanted to talk to you," he murmurs to Tifa.
**
((...Also that is like three different attempts at that scene spliced together just now. So pretty much everything I've done with this fic lately was just "Oh, I think I have an idea. No, I don't know how to make the idea work. Let's try this. Now I'm frustrated. Let's try something else. LET'S GO BACK TO THIS...))
**
Her fingers twitched before clasping around cloud's bicep. "Cloud."
He looked at her with confusion. She knew her request was one that would throw him for a loop.
"Let me go up to Aerith first," she whispered. Because she could protect Aerith too, because she wanted to. She wanted to protect Cloud.
He nodded, though with uncertainty in his eyes, and she strode toward the first pillar and took a short leap up to it. She wondered if originally they'd been closer, or had more pillars in between--they weren't level but slightly crooked beneath her feet, leading to the guess that they'd been disturbed at one point.
And yet, still, she passed with little enough noise. Aerith did not stir one bit, which made Tifa grit her teeth. They had been so worried about her... shouldn't she at least acknowledge them? But the woman continued to keep her head bowed, hands clasped.
...Perhaps, then, she was communicating to someone. Probably the Planet. After sharing dreams with Cloud, Aerith wouldn't exactly be pulling a surprise by communicating to the Planet by prayer. So this was what she'd left them behind for.
A cut-off sound pulled her attention back for just a moment. Cloud had started toward the pillar, only for Barret to immediately grab his shoulder. He wanted to see Aerith, so it shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone...but it seemed to be a surprise to himself. His eyes were a touch wide, mouth working fruitlessly for a second before he closed it and shook his head.
Tifa wasn't sure if she wanted to know, not when they were so close to having Aerith back, so she crossed the final pillar into the threshold of the altar.
Aerith was still in prayer. Tifa wanted to shake her out of it and one hand rose to do that, but she just--couldn't. Aerith had come here to pray, so she needed to do that, obviously. She was the one saving the world, and just watching her... Tifa wasn't sure if it was the angle of her brow or the curve of her shoulders in prayer, but somehow she could see Aerith was pouring her whole heart into that.
Finally, green eyes opened, and Aerith immediately smiled at Tifa. It was the warmth of that gesture and the sure sign of hope behind it--Aerith was done praying and she was happy, it must mean something good--that let the tension ease out of the brawler's muscles, even as she caught herself and resolved that she wanted to tell the other woman how she felt about that little vanishing trick back in Gongaga.
"Aerith, we were so worried--"
In the glass surrounding them, there was a single flicker: a shadow, where there should only have been light.
It was enough for Tifa to shove Aerith back. And that was enough to place her in the path of a blade she recognized all too well when it sliced through her stomach from front to back.
Masamune. Seeing it embedded into her flesh once again felt unreal, but she was already struggling to pull in breath. Not a dream then, not a nightmare.
This...this was something she might never wake up from.
IN CONCLUSION: I think I am pretty much going about this chapter all wrong and am just now contemplating doing the final chapter as a sort of round of sleeping scenes...especially since I for some reason want to write about Aerith in the Sleeping Forest on her own. Even though no one else is with her \o_o/ I have pretty much hit the wall for a while now on knowing what I want to do with this.
Re: 2/2
Date: 2013-07-23 09:03 pm (UTC)I'd very much agree with your interpretation of 'sweetheart' and 'soul mate' there; there is a difference in feel to them I'd personally add innocent/innocence to the sweetheart meaning as well; there's something chaste-like to the term/it being a stage before becoming lovers kind of feel to it (it also sort of feels like its a more one-sided situation. Both can be the other's sweetheart but that doesn't have the same reciprocal feel as a soul mate). And yeah soul mate has a concrete certainty to this and there is no doubt about how you relate to the other (even though it doesn't necessarily apply to romance). Definitely liking the reflecting back to realise that once Cloud's back to himself properly she really does have two soul mates; she's probably still not entirely taken with the concept, but she can't really think of anyway to express the connection the three of them wind up with.
Ack! Yeah, I did wonder if the two Tifa sections were supposed to be directly connected, and even though its restating the scene it felt like it was only slightly too much exposition for the time passing. Definitely accepting head-canon from now on that both Cloud and Aeris were laid up in the Gongaga inn - and it does feel right the village is too small for the group; they aren't going to expect tourists, they have little of value after the reactor exploded, and random visitors are a distinct rarity.
Ah the phrasing about checking is just how it sounds in my head, so feel free to ignore that one (and I should remember slight language differences as to me "He spit" sounds really off versus "He spat").
Ah okay, that part about there being no pause makes sense like that - and yeah I'd agree it feels too early for her to know that the task requires a Cetra, she just knows the Planet wants her to do something and go somewhere currently. And that does work nicely with Tifa adrift in the situation and latching onto that first thing she can. heh - that is true, Tifa *would* be willing to do anything, it just seemed to nicely tie into what was coming. Glad you like the scale/balance thing! And I can definitely see that Tifa thinking if Cloud wakes up okay then things will be fine, and he can help stop Aeris doing something dangerous.
Hehe - yeah of all the aspects of Aeris's plan, going alone is right out in Tifa's book.
Oh, the echo to Utena would be really good (and I could see Tifa saying this after concluding she's lost in the love-triangle as well; the need to be part of Aeris's life even if she can be nothing more then friends), but yeah so very hypocritical given what Aeris is about to do - so yeah, very much the sentiment is nice, but really not the time for it (and if she did I can see Tifa endlessly rehearsing what she'll say when they find Aeris again, and those thoughts just dry up when they do find her, and Tifa is too happy to shout at her now (except that then this could occur randomly much later when everything is calm/after Tifa's been healed)) and that probably would lead into an argument between them. So I'd agree I think the situation reads right as it is; they've wound in a state none of them really wanted, but they need Cloud awake and no end of the world scenario hanging over them to start sorting themselves out.
Hooray for the Aeris-centric section if you do write that.
Haha - Tifa in my responses/reading of the fic winds up channeling so much of my relationship anxieties - not that I have been in anything like that situation, but its just the little worries I'd wind up fixating on, the relief when nothing happens but the worry that next time, next time is the heartbreak of seeing something. But yes, I can easily see her clearing out if they were both awake to give the couple some time alone and that just leaving things slightly awkward between Cloud and Aeris so Aeris goes to fetch her back (kind of like Fidelity when Cloud is *determined* to give Zack and Tifa their alone time while completely misreading the whole situation). And the shippiness was really nice of them curling up to sleep.
It really isn't quite the right moment, but it is amusing to think of Aeris waking up and surveying the situation/how hemmed in she was/how that seemed such a good idea at the time to let Tifa really snuggle into her but now she needs to get going. She's already a little tangled in the sheets/leaning across Tifa is just going to wake her, upwards has a wall in the way. Well, down it is then. *wriggle*wriggle* And yeah her dress is just tangled and sliding up her legs.
I like the thought actually that once everything is settled down, Tifa pulls out a notebook which has become headed "Little things I need to talk about to Aeris" (which becomes more important once she realises she's in love) to go through things like fifteen minutes of chatting means fifteen minutes, the perils of saving the world solo and stretching white lies and you: why she shouldn't do it again. I'd very agree Tifa's sentiment is exactly right, its Aeris's successful defusing of it that needs a slight adjustment. And oh! I really like the rejoining Tifa on the bed and humming the lullaby like that with the changed lyrics and that has a great rightness to it (more subtle then I had Aeris with her just using Sleep in on her). Especially the far too late realisation of what Aeris is doing and she can't let her... (and then that one goes in the book of dicussions above: why using magic to subdue your loved ones is a really bad thing). And yeah, definitely something to be dicussed in the One Who Didn't Die with her.
Definitely like the choice of Vincent - and that is good reasoning for it too (though I do also like Barret and Yuffie's enthusiastic searching, leaving Cid to ask Vincent about the better way to do this for the remainder of the party). Ah, I forgot about rant from Cid in the next fic (been a while since I read it...), but that does make sense for why Tifa doesn't entertain the idea - even now Aeris isn't going to run into the infested jungle like that. And true if Tifa was put out with magic that does undercut some of the thought process sadly. As much as I like the incremental worries/realisations/fears from Tifa, the lullaby currently wins out over that.
Ah, I did rethink the comment about the love triangle comment and realized I was looking from too far ahead. The abandoning Cloud at this stage to go with Aeris is actually better on reflection as Tifa has fallen for Aeris but doesn't realise it yet - at this stage she's not thinking polyamorously so it has to be one rather then the other, and currently it's Aeris who's winning and she doesn't care how her affections are currently orientated; she has to be kept safe; whether for her gain or Cloud's is currently immaterial. The Cloud aspects are sort of brewing, but Cloud needs to be fixed first - Tifa isn't entirely sure about Cloud; its that whole judgement of them both that Aeris could be her soul mate and she can't think of Cloud in those terms yet. So actually, ignore the previous comment as I was looking at this with meta knowledge most readers aren't going to have! Oh, and the fear that Aeris might pull a similar stunt to her own confrontation with Sephiroth is good one, and yeah given how that one went, she *cannot* let Aeris do that as well.
Ah, that works for Barret's knowledge. I like that.
Hooray I got the inference! And yeah the dream apology is a little light-weight given what the apology is for, and I like that idea that he can't really remember, but has that memory he dearly hopes isn't true and it can't be that bad because Aeris is so willing to talk to him... and damn. And to his horror (and leading into his fears) its just as bad as he feared.
Ack - yeah Tifa's POV does sound essential for why the conversation he's trying to have isn't going to get very far... And yeah I can see Tifa being surprised/uncomfortable by the sudden increase in attention (she might also attribute it to fair-weather friendship/some doubts about how Cloud does feel about Aeris if he's going to take to her so rapidly like this). And yeah I can see Tifa thinking that if everything is still okay she'll tell Aeris how she feels and see how things come out, and then drop the bomb on Cloud in a different sense).
I do like the wondering about the altar under the city as its one thing that is overlooked; it half looks like a city down there rather then a place of worship, so I do like questions about how and why the city appears to us as it does (and if there were more organic buildings that are gone in the largely barren areas, or are there other ways down to areas like the altar where the Cetra lived...). I think the Sephiroth encouraging Cloud to go to Aeris before Tifa feeds back into the tumblr conversation of Cloud needing a justification for his impulses - at that point he's compelled but he honestly also wants to be the one to talk to Aeris, but does back down at Tifa's request. The second movement curtailed by Barret is more blatant manipulation and that's going to worry him somewhat that he's agreed to not go up there, but his body suddenly overrode his mind...
Ah - as above, too long since I read the One Who Didn't Die, but I do like that this plan going wrong has opened him up to an unguarded moment, however quickly he recovers and tries to hide it.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-07-27 05:53 pm (UTC)(Also I have pretty much accepted at this point that at least Aerith's part and probably Tifa's will be totally long compared to other chapters. OH WELL.)
**
Sleep was what guarded the greatest secret of the Planet, and sleep was what guarded Aerith now. Her own rest back in Gongaga had been filled with dreams of a forest, the voices of the trees rustling through their leaves to her, branches beckoning her to come, come. Northward. The summons was to a place on the northern continent. She'd reached out to them with her spirit, her thoughts seeking root to stand her in their earth, but that wasn't enough: they needed her to arrive in the flesh.
Still, she'd made some connection, drawing back with her to the waking world a small gift of their knowledge in Planet magic, a powerful tranquility that could lull even the fiercest of monsters… or the most steadfast of friends. Tifa hadn't suspected the new ability until it took hold of her, and the confusion in her wine red eyes as she'd finally stopped clutching Aerith's wrist had hurt to see. She hadn't understood why she was letting go, because it was something she wouldn't have done of her own choice. The woman from sector 7 had suffered such a terrible loss just a few months ago, her second home and three good friends, it was little surprise she'd cling at the fear of losing another comrade. Aerith wished she'd lingered and murmured lullabies until Tifa was in a slumber all her own. She wished she hadn't needed to leave at all. But she had, and quickly; so she'd used a trick.
Tifa was going to be really mad at her. …She would be alive to get mad. That was what was most important. Sephiroth had proven all too willing to hurt, kill and use people to make his miserable future a reality. Shinra Headquarters and the cargo ship to Costa Del Sol had both been turned into bloodbaths by him. The temple had had only one casualty, Tseng…and his body had been missing as they left the Temple to escape its shrinking confines. Hopefully that meant a rescue by the other Turks, and healing; Aerith didn't want to think of him dead, for all he'd been dead wrong about her ever helping Shinra. But then there was Cloud. To say she was scared of Cloud now wouldn't be even remotely correct. But scared for him? Yes. He still hadn't woken as she'd left; his injuries ran so much deeper than her bruises and lacerations. Just the night before the temple, before everything had gone wrong, she'd felt sure enough that something was amiss to try asking him about it where they couldn't be interrupted, where he couldn't feel pressured to keep up his confident act, and though his blank confusion had left her even more disquieted… even her worst suspicion, that Cloud might have something in common with the black-cloaked figures, hadn't prepared her for the unvoiced wailing that had started the moment Sephiroth held an expectant hand out to the younger man.
Something terrible had been done to Cloud. No soul should ever sound like that, be in that much pain. She didn't know how to heal it, but she could at least try to make sure Sephiroth didn't take advantage of that hurt again. That meant keeping Cloud safe, away from the conflict and with friends who would help him out. None of their friends needed to be involved in this. Really, it was better for her to be on her own right now; one person was harder to track than nine, lighter and swifter on her feet than the whole group.
And right now, she didn't even need to rest. Sleep was a necessity for many living things, but for the moment that didn't seem to include her. Her night and day alike passed in transit through an ever-changing landscape, first walking on foot and then charming her way onto a truck, which led to stowing away on a boat on the second evening, still alert, buoyed by not only the waves but the fear of an entire Planet transfigured into adrenaline that shot through her body like lightning. Because it knew, and now she did too, that she was the only one who could fix things. Even if she didn't know how yet; that piece of the puzzle was still unclear in the silent turmoil rumbling through the earth.
…No pressure, right? She ignored the choppy sea to keep her eyes fixed on the northern skies, once it was late enough for her to dare creeping out. Her mind was on the calm forest, full of life and peace. That was the first step to stopping Sephiroth in his tracks. The rest could be figured out there.
One Shinra sailor discovered her in the morning as she was sneaking off-board. One Shinra sailor was going to have a very bad day, kicking it off by napping on duty. She followed the unloading of goods to a village of ruins and excited excavators; though she overheard its name being said, besides a thought of how apt it was, she couldn't remember it a moment later. Her mind was on the forest, and the forest was in front of her. It started some ways ahead, at the edge of the village, but the silver tint to the lush leaves was immediately recognizable, and that one wayward branch…it was swaying slightly, easily dismissed as only the wind, but she took it as a welcome.
She ran to it. She was just at the fringe, almost inside when a firm hand caught her by the shoulder and spun her around to a man who stared down at her with disbelief. Sleep sprang to mind, the magic so strong with the woods at her back, but that impulse was checked by the layer of dirt on his clothes. Hardly threatening at all; this was someone who loved nature and got up close and personal with it. Too bad he was likely one of the excavators and not a gardener. "Miss," he said, "Don't you know it's dangerous to go in there?! That's the Sleeping Forest—"
Another apt name, she mused. She should have guessed. Someone around here was either very wise, or very uncreative.
"…You go in now without a lunar harp to wake it up, and it'll confuse you! You could get lost forever!"
'Lunar harp' sounded like a rare thing. Sounded like a delay. Sounded like the last thing she wanted or anyone needed. She hummed, tucking her hands behind her and looking upward to where the canopy of leaves stretched into sky. Would the forest really confuse her? Now, of all times? That'd be rather poor of it, since its life was linked to the Planet's.
The branch was waving her in. The leaves were rustling, and that pull on her, like she was water in the earth being drawn in by their roots, was as strong as ever.
Come.
She needed to listen to and trust in the voices leading her if anything was going to get done.
Aerith dropped her chin to beam widely at the excavator and shifted her small bag of possessions back onto her shoulder, making the things in it jangle and shift. "That's sweet of you to worry, but I already have one."
"What, really?" he blurted, clearly surprised.
"Of course! After all, I'm being expected."
He looked so stumped by that statement, glancing suspiciously at her and her light bag, but the important thing was that he didn't protest or stop her again as she ran into the forest.
And then, suddenly, she was well and truly lost, even as she came to a stop only thirty yards from the entrance. She knew which way that was still. The problem was that it was becoming clear the forest didn't have the answer she was looking for. Its invitation taken, it seemed content to sleep, like its part was done. It took some time for her to calm down from the panic that ensued—what was she doing out here, if not saving the Planet? How could she have left Tifa and Cloud and everyone else behind for nothing?—reach out to the Planet again, and realize that the forest really had been a first step. The trees were knowledgeable because their roots ran deep enough to brush near a vein of Lifestream, and their elders had taught and been taught by the Cetra, but they weren't all-knowing. They knew where the answer was, but they didn't have it themselves. And if they had nothing more to say now than satisfied murmurs of a cultivator's return…the answer must be just past them. Where her ancestors had lived.
(no subject)
Date: 2013-07-27 05:54 pm (UTC)Now was the time to rest. Even the Planet seemed to recognize it, the steady pulse of its fear ebbing, letting the exhaustion previously put aside leech back into her limbs. Aerith laid herself down under one of the biggest trees, where spots of sunlight peeked through the boughs to warm her hair. It was such an idyllic place for a nap with her bolero folded under her head for a pillow, and she wasn't exactly lacking for company with the trees dozing all around her or a Planet brushing up against her mind periodically as if it needed to make sure she was still exactly where she'd been left. Which it probably did need to make sure, given she was the only Cetra, but honestly.
"You are being an awful lot like Cloud right now," she sighed tiredly. Not lacking for company, yet missing particular ones all the same. Having traveled with AVALANCHE for so long now, she couldn't help but fill in missing places. Cloud would have gotten a campsite set up, but in lieu of tents he'd take position with his back to a tree, almost like her, though she doubted he'd also take the luxury of actually lying down. No, he'd sit upright, and only close his eyes after a silent head-count, and Aerith always had to wonder if he'd ever slept easily. Yuffie would be sprawled out and already snoring, used to rough bedding; Nanaki would also be quick to sleep but neater about it, curled up with one ear tilted up to hear an approach. He'd learned to tune out Barret, who usually had to grumble some before he could get comfortable. Vincent and Cid were harder to place and Aerith was admittedly distracted from their pretend naps as she realized she kept placing Tifa close by her side despite the open space. But that was just how they were most comfortable, close by each other, with Tifa's exhale and inhale a second rhythm to play off the breath of the earth. The woman could wear a crown of flowers in her hair, crooked from sleep but still marking her as queen of the forest and stubborn Cetra for a day, a sort of apology. Maybe just an excuse to see her face framed by floral color. Aerith was sure she'd look beautiful.
One green eye slit open to immediate disappointment. No Tifa. No Barret. No Nanaki, no Yuffie, no Cloud. Safely away, she reminded herself: that's where they needed to be. Especially Cloud. And she needed to be…she closed her eyes again, one ear turned to the ground, and reached out with her hand to brush the knot of a bumpy root where it broke earth. As her fingers traced the patterns of its bark, her mind traced its path below ground, twisting down through many yards of soil and rock to that smooth vein of milky green. How can Meteor be stopped? she asked the current, and it murmured back:
North. Searching. Magic, protection lodged deep in the heart of the Planet. Sleep magic had been easy to borrow from the shallows of the Lifestream; this could not be borrowed. This could only be unlocked, and allowed to run its course.
The current couldn't tell her any more than that, not clearly. It was a closely guarded secret, necessary with certain creatures having tried to use that knowledge for harm. She'd have to figure out the rest when she woke back up. She thanked the current and, as her body fell to sleep, turned her attention in the opposite direction to flow with it as she retraced her journey. After miles of land there was a crack in the sea floor where the pale glow of the Lifestream flowed up and refracted through miles and miles of ocean water, and here Aerith was for a moment horrified and almost jolted back to her body by the realization that the edges of the Lifestream were touching living bodies, fish from their smooth movements. That horror gave way to astonishment as their movements continued smoothly, not just fearless of mako poisoning but seemingly completely unaffected by the exposure, maybe even numb to it; they didn't seem very interested in the volume of knowledge in the flow. A human body couldn't have coped with it at all.
Then the Lifestream winded back into earth, and she followed it with careful navigation around a large packet of silence that had to be the Corel desert and found Gongaga by the bitter tang of its earth that only grew sharper as the Lifestream brushed up against the ruined reactor. Aerith's thoughts flicked through a long-stagnant puddle of mako, getting a feel for its sense, before jumping to the much more potent energy close by in the village, contained in the person she'd wanted to check on: Cloud.
'You're still sleeping?', she thought in dismay. She'd hoped he was still in the village, and it was possible he'd woken up at some point and fallen back asleep naturally, but that didn't seem like the case. His mind was worryingly quiet, without dream or drive. There was only one thought she could pick up, and it was tainted with confusion and fear.
…Don't wake me.
Aerith pulled back, fearful of upsetting him, for all of a handful of seconds. But—he couldn't just not wake up. She was sure they'd had this conversation with Vincent, so Cloud really ought to know better by now. …She couldn't exactly blame him for forgetting, when his mind felt like its own tomb. Rather than scolding, she'd have to lure him out. It was more than she'd planned to do, but leaving him like this for another moment was unthinkable; he wasn't the only one who needed to recover. With how much time had passed with her gone and him still sleeping, everyone must be worried sick. Poor Tifa especially…
What would make Cloud agreeable to waking up after the nightmarish reality of the temple? How could she persuade him? The answer seemed obvious after some brief thought: a dream. A restful dream that he wouldn't have to wake up for, but could restore some of his hope for the waking world. And she knew just the place to show him, gently pushing thoughts of the Sleeping Forest at him, showing where each tree sprung up and how the sunlight filtered through leaves tickled by a gentle breeze.
But as she built up each part of the dream, there was only silence. Was she taking the wrong tack completely? Was it impossible for her to help him? She shooed that thought away; it wouldn't help. She had to show him a brighter outlook right now. With that in mind she stepped into the dream herself, choosing a tree from which to peek out. Playfully, just as she might have on a better day.
"Cloud, can you hear me?"
He didn't appear as she'd hoped, but a response did come, cautious and almost child-like: Yeah, I hear you. Sorry for what happened.
She smiled. Any response was better than nothing, and he didn't need to feel worse about what had happened. The injuries were long gone, and it hadn't really been him who hurt her. "Don't worry about it."
I can't help it…
"Oh…" That sure was the sound of guilt there. She couldn't be surprised it wasn't so simple for Cloud; anyone with a bit of rationality would have been upset by that. How to reassure him? She played a bit as she thought, disappearing behind her tree and choosing to jump out from another as both a distraction and invitation for Cloud. Didn't she seem to be having fun? This was their dream, a reality they could play with however they wanted. Maybe he'd like to join her?
Still no appearance. Well, he did think differently from her. In fact— "Then, why don't you REALLY worry about it?" she suggested, hoping this wouldn't backfire and make him more afraid. She would have hated being told to worry, but it wasn't like he could pretend nothing was wrong… actually, he had pretended extremely convincingly, but they'd still ended up here from that. Obviously it wasn't the answer. What he needed, now that the problem was staring him in the face, was to accept it was there but believe that he'd get better. And he would get better. They'd gotten this far, hadn't they? And she was figuring out how to take care of Meteor. "Let me handle Sephiroth!" She pounded a fist against her chest and laughed, as if the man didn't scare her at all. Having a Planet on her side helped, and she let herself disappear before peeking out from a third tree. "And Cloud, you take care of yourself. So you don't have a breakdown, okay?"
It was, admittedly, a very simple plan for a serious problem that neither of them seemed to know the cause of. But there were seven reasons why it'd work: all their friends were with him. And once she'd worked out the Planet's protection against Meteor, she'd talk with Tifa again; maybe they could tease out more of the issue that way. They both wanted to help Cloud.
This time she dropped down from the canopy, slowly, like she was a leaf that could catch the breeze. And after a few seconds, Cloud joined her in the carefree fall, his bright blue eyes fixed on her with eagerness. Even if the tension in his dream self said he was still scared, he was listening to her, trusting her. She could just about cheer but swallowed that outburst behind a broadening smile. Once they were both on the ground, he looked about them—and see! Curiosity! He'd want to know what was going on in the waking world too soon enough. "Where are we?"
Hmm. Why not tell him? Since he knew there was a problem, he'd feel reassured to know better what was being done to fix it. "This forest leads to a city of the Ancients… and is called the Sleeping Forest." Again, an apt name. Her smile quirked before growing more solemn. "It's only a matter of time before Sephiroth uses Meteor. That's why I'm going to stop it. Only a survivor of the Cetra can do it. Only me." She took a few steps toward the bright sunlight on the other side of the trees to show a general idea of where she was headed before her feet abruptly stopped.
She could feel something calling her, even in this dream. No, because she was in this dream. The Sleeping Forest would confuse any person who wandered into it while it was sleeping with its dreams, ever-shifting and changing… unless the person was able to shift and change with them. That was why it had been time to rest.
"The secret is just up here," and she barely remembered to turn back as she said that. Right, she was explaining things to Cloud. "At least it should be." …Though maybe that had been a little too honest. She quickly shook her head, putting more firmness in her voice. "I feel it. It feels like I'm being led by something."
Oh, dear. He looked worried, a frown marring the beginnings of calm in his expression. She cut in quickly; she didn't have time to stay and reassure him, much as she'd like, so she'd have to stop him from worrying before that could get seriously underway. "Then, I'll be going now. I'll come back when it's all over." She waved, then turned to go. Cloud would wake up. She'd known from their very first meeting that he was resilient. He just needed encouragement.
Still, the confusion his voice put in her name as he tried to call her back stung just a bit, bringing back the memory of Tifa's lost expression as she'd let go. She hoped they both understood she was doing this because it was the best way to keep everyone safe. If she was the only one who could fight Sephiroth's plan, she was the only one who needed to be in any danger. It was that simple.
For now, she focused on getting through the dream of the forest.
**
...Basically I think "I have ideas" with me and Aerith really means OOOH OOOH CAN I MESS AROUND WITH PLANET MAGIC NOW lmfao
(no subject)
Date: 2013-07-27 08:53 pm (UTC)I do like all the new Planet knowledge and how that lets her subdue Tifa, and the implication this is how she's wandering easily without being attacked once by anything. Really do like that Aeris would have rather gotten Tifa back to sleep by her own efforts, and one part of the reason why Tifa would be so reluctant to let her go (oh you three... please talk to each other. Soon. Except I know that's a good way off). But she has gotten her justifications in place in her mind; she's not minding that Tifa will be angry, she's guaranteeing Tifa will be there to be angry with her. I... honestly can't remember if Tseng is due to survive in the next fic; I remember from some stuff on Tumblr recently that you don't mind him surviving (certainly not as objectionable as Rufus's shakey ability to not die), and I like how this has been left open-ended for either option. Really like that she isn't scared of Cloud, but scared for Cloud... and this is part of why she makes the dream connection later, and that she doesn't yet understand how its ocurred but is determined to not allow it to be exploited again.
And she has so many justifications for being on her own! And from a third person, meta-knowledge perspective we know her conclusions aren't necessarily quite correct, but its effective for why she does believe she needs to do this. The not resting is a nice idea too, and helps for the speed of her leaving and partly how she can get to the Sleeping Forest so quickly.
Little details are really nice like the Shinra sailor shortly to have a very bad day when discovering her, and I like how she's gotten too used to that power by the time she reaches the forest edge - it's all about removing the obstruction quickly rather then responding to the situation, and how close she came to just doing it automatically - it feels like while she might well retain the ability after this she'll be a lot more sparing as she was just plowing through obstructions with it. And I really do like that she's more willing to talk to him given his dirty appearance.
(really like her cheerful I already have one claim about the Lunar Harp, and that the lie is either so outrageous, or faintly plausible it gives her enough time to get away from the excavator).
...and I like that the Sleeping Forest immediately gets Aeris to sleep here. It's like it was adrenaline rushing/caffeine infusing her to get her to a place where no one can (easily) follow, and now it really needs to let her body recover - it's overwritten her basic biology, but it can't make her indestructible so she needs a break (...and random thought while typing: what if the pause were due to her half-human nature? Not sure I like my own idea here, but the human side of her needs this break, needs to recover, while the Planet could get a full Cetra the entire rest of the way AND start the summoning sequence for Holy).
Liking the Planet being very sure where it left its last Cetra though.
The imagined campsite layout is really cute and how she does lay out where everyone is, and she fumbles slightly on Cid and Vincent, but only because she's realised she's imagining Tifa right next to her, and that just overrides the thought process, and that's fine because they're comfortable like that, and Aeris imagining her with the floral crown was nice. And then - yeah, she has to check. She knows its not going to reveal everyone there, but she does it anyway just in case.
And the Planet still isn't going to clear on what she has to do...
I'd always formerly thought of the dream intrusion by Aeris as her being awake and connecting to Cloud, but I do like it as part of her falling asleep. And I especially like the connecting to the undersea rift (subject of many fake-rumours for FFVII), and I really like the odd detail about the oceanic ecosystem that is in place around the Lifestream here - and how initially that connection feels horrific, before fading as she observes them. And I like her following it round to Gongaga, orientating herself with the Corel desert.
This whole next section I'm not sure I can comment on, as I just like how you've combined the game-script with the thought processes behind the choice of words, the phrasing, how Aeris is presenting herself and her reactions or lack of visible reactions to Cloud. Especially little details about how she eventually coaxes him to appear in the dream after initially appearing and disappearing as she does... And just how much she trusts their friends at this stage; seven reasons why her plan would work, and how once this is done, then she and Tifa are going to fix Cloud.
(especially like that even in the dream she gets distracted by the Planet's call, and has to concentrate to turn back and say goodbye, and her notion that since she is the only one who can stop Sephiroth, she should be the only one in danger. Simple, but oh Aeris, they wouldn't have parted with you for the world. At least later they can demonstrate that...)
***
In short: this was really, really good! And I do like Aeris messing with Planet magic. And now to the actual reply!
this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-28 06:36 pm (UTC)I did wonder if maybe the reason given for Tifa is a bit too impersonal--which seems really weird because it's still about them being friends, but I just don't know if it comes through on the phrasing that even if Aerith hasn't twigged onto 'love' they are very dear friends. Or maybe it's that she knows but she also thinks it'd hurt Tifa just as much to lose anyone in AVALANCHE so she's not elevating herself...which is probably about what I was thinking the first time I wrote it. PHRASING. /bats at But haha yeeeeeah they need to talk. And circumstances are not going to help them talk for a while (it's so tempting to AU something so that Tifa doesn't land in the second "out for a week" situation after the northern crater because GOSH that is a lot of unconsciousness to go through. And then at the same time I'm not sure how I would change things up if she was awake the whole time--would Barret and her even be in Shinra custody, given that it seemed to be a trap under the guise of getting proper care for Tifa? \o_O/ Something to think about when I'm actually writing the next fic, I guess...)
Oh man that tumblr conversation annoyed me for how much it harped on "but Rufus is interesting his story is interesting" INTERESTING IS SUBJECTIVE??? (I like how his story possibly being framed as a tragedy was pooh-pahed, like VII and really most Final Fantasies aren't built up on tragedies.) Anyway. My issue with Rufus and Tseng's retconned survivals isn't so much from a worldbuilding or characterization standpoint (Tseng's death only got Elena pissed off at the party which is easily possible with the compilation explanation that has him disappearing, Scarlet and Heidegger don't need Rufus to be all the way dead yet to be their jerky selves and power-hungry) so much as a dramatic/writing standpoint (compilation is kind of like FFIV at this point--no one moderately important really dies except Tellah. Or Aerith/Zack and I'd bet money that's only because that would make the preferred portrayal for Cloud utter nonsense). Also, the feasibility of some of the survivals is really really weak ("L" for "loser" YES BECAUSE THE PRESIDENT WOULD WANT THAT IN HIS OFFICE JUST TO MAKE FUN OF HIS SON??? ffs his whole thing is money money money, sure he might mock his son at the moment but why would he actually have commissioned the project and wasted money on something he thought useless). Basically it's easy enough for me to ignore in writing a fanfic the "they're dead! ...wait, no they're not" nonsense that I wouldn't feel the need to kill them off unless I thought they were blocking more interesting possibilities. The fic's not about how they died so I'm not going to worry about how they miraculously survived either, that's off-screen as much as possible. Which is why Aerith isn't going "He died :(" in here but "oh man Sephiroth be crazy, he could have killed Tseng :(... but I haven't heard him die, maybe he got rescued...?"
tl;dr I still think Rufus' survival is ridiculous but both him and Tseng will survive 'the one who didn't die' unless I feel murderous toward fictional characters at some point in plotting (...not impossible). A live Rufus will quietly have been on the fringe of the blast rather than lol smack dab center in my head. I am mildly in despair people think retcons are necessary for interesting stories. MOVING ON
Just given her canon attitude toward Cloud, I can't think she was ever mad at or scared of Cloud for what had happened. I guess I like to make a note of it because it's so easy for Cloud to have thought she did (and this might come up a bit in his section. maybe. to be honest I'm not quite sure what tack I'm using to open that section yet.)
Haha the "not resting" initially tied into the sleep magic too and it was more like Aerith DID have complete control over both the magic and what was going on with her body, but then it seemed sort of odd to do it that way considering sleep is actually a necessary thing. So yeah it got tweaked to be the Planet pretty much pushing her to go go go and she's supposed to come off as edging toward slap-happy by the time she gets to Bone Village--she's so focused on the Forest that she doesn't remember the town's name, she has gotten trigger-happy with the magic (which yes, she'll be more careful with later on), and she's having some inane thoughts when the night before her thoughts were purely serious. She's still on-task enough to get things done but prooooobably would've needed sleep soon no matter what.
Funny enough at one point her being half-human was actually connected to the travel, but in a positive way--all the modes of transportation (besides her walking) are man-made, and she was going to be musing about how she knew to go where the Lifestream was muddled to find civilization. Then it was like "wow this is getting long already". (Though now that I say all her transportation was man-made, it's kind of humorous to think of the group finding her missing...and the chocobo lure. c'mon Planet, send her a gold! (Truly random tangent: one of her abilities in Theatrhythm is to increase the chances of getting a good chocobo during special segments. She's the only one who learns that ability.)) I don't really see the Cetra as hardier than humans so if a pure Cetra would have made it I would attribute it more to lifestyle (...and Aerith is less experience to harsh traveling so there could be something there) than physiology.
In the end, I did make it that her being asleep is actually a requirement for crossing the Sleeping Forest without the Lunar Harp (in the beginning this was going to actually be Aerith having to wake the Forest without the harp but still with music and involve singing and then it was like "no no not that much singing we are not making her a Disney princess here, just the lullaby"), so it's not all that bad that she has to sleep there, and is in fact part of why the Planet backs off for the moment...just a bit. Because yeah it is not letting its last Cetra wander off. XD
(ahaha the lie about the Lunar Harp is faintly plausible, which is part of why he lets her go, but it is very surprising and is surely going to seem more and more outrageous the more he thinks about it--because they can only be excavated there and he'd never seen her before.)
It's funny, but I just always thought of Aerith as being asleep when she contacted Cloud and lucid-dreaming. It's probably because when I was younger I was pretty interested in dreams and out-of-body experiences, even if I didn't believe in them. (...well, considering how I wrote this section, it's probably fair to say I still find them interesting XD) I'm not sure what is with me and FF7 and deep sea fish right now but I just really wanted to detail the oceanic rift and that there's still life down there, even as the Lifestream's gushing up into it. ...Now I'm curious what kind of rumors there were, though I'm not surprised there would be some--especially after one of the locales in FFV was a rift in the ocean floor.
I'm very, very glad that the scene for Aerith's dream sent to Cloud worked for you. It was a kind of weird turnabout as the whole dream is intended to make Aerith a bit mysterious, we're supposed to feel lost with Cloud about what she's doing, but at the same time Aerith's personality is such that there should be a sort of logic to this for her and she probably doesn't mean to cause Cloud any confusion at such a crucial time. I always knew I wanted the appearances/disappearances she pulls to be playful, but I was a bit stumped as how to handle Cloud's initial nonappearance in the scene--was she actually seeing him and he was just not in the screen, or what? The way his dialogue presentation changes seems to suggest he's not just off-screen but not with her at all at first and it turned into her having to coax him and in fact her trying to coax him to realize it's okay to wake up (which giving her a realistic travel time made seem like a necessity--he's surely been healed of all injuries at this point, so why hasn't he woken up yet? Unless it's because, as he says himself in the white-out scene, he doesn't think he should).
And yes, she trusts AVALANCHE...and still doesn't get why it's not okay to just run off without them to protect them. She will be hearing why she shouldn't in events to come, and Tifa and Cloud in particular definitely have strong feelings about that.
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-28 09:17 pm (UTC)I do think Aeris reckons losing anyone in Avalanche is going to hurt Tifa - especially after the loses in Midgar and throughout her life - it feeds into that observation that the VII cast are realyl likely to remain and be friends; there's no hint of allied for a mutual goal against their better judgement (not that I can think of that many examples in the FFs - Amarant keeps coming to mind in IX, but generally I can see the casts not wanting to lose touch in the aftermaths). And yeah, unfortunately circumstances get in the way of that rather vital discussion... Heh - I can definitely see the appeal of AUing to avoid the second week of unconciousness post-North Crater - especially given these circumstances where she's unconcious already... But yeah that does raise some complications for how/why/if Barret and Tifa are split off from the others at that stage, and what happens otherwise (if I remember the plan right, wasn't Aeris going to fall back into Hojo's clutches at this point?)
Haha! Yeah, the Compilation has got shades of FFIV to it - no one can die except Zack/Aeris - and yeah that's only stayed as it would impact Cloud too badly (I would also bet that the notion of concluding AC with Aeris/Zack's resurrection was mooted by someone along the line). You're right though, the refusal to let the characters die is infuriating - Tseng was a debatable point - though I think always assumed to be dead, while Rufus had sufficient fans to keep him alive in some instances. And oh, yeah the whole thing with President Shinra and the escape hatch and the L for Loser... I think this was the part of On the Way to a Smile it really felt like I was reading a badfic rather then an official addition to canon. Plus that even with that its badly designed as it seems to be responsible for several of Rufus's more problematic injuries rather then having the office explode around him.
Definitely liking Rufus on the edge of Diamond Weapon's blast rather then taking it to the face... And urgh; yeah, I don't see how retcons can be seen as necessary for interesting stories, or to even extend existing stories. (definite despair there)
I really liked that detail that Aeris is so focused on her mission she does miss Bone Village's name (at the same time, I did wonder if you were implying that Bone Village was more of a nickname and the place has an actual name of its own? Just one we never hear). Definitely liking the humorous notion of them finding Aeris gone and one single materia - the choco lure. And yeah, if the Planet sent her a Gold Chocobo, she'd be to the City of the Ancients in no time... (also that's a cool but random note on Theatrhythm).
Ah, yeah Aeris singing to wake the forest would be going too Disney Princess there (though would potentially allow that version of Aeris to get more involved in Kingdom Hearts if she was one of the princesses... Then again, sadly they seem to mostly get captured, so not such a great plan). But I do like the lie about the Lunar Harp - and it is effective because of the vague plausibility (despite being simultaneously very unlikely). Heh - dreams and out of body experiences are interesting - even if not believable, and the concepts behind them are useful for things like this. But its an interesting different way I'd never considered before, that Aeris can get into Cloud's dreams because they're both asleep and dreaming - it has a very nice right feel to it.
The detail on the oceanic rift is very welcome, and its something never detailed in canon as we never see any other life in the depths outside of Emerald Weapon - and it matches to the deep-sea organisms that live around the oceanic volcanic vents - very easy to see life around a Lifestream vent adapating to the conditions (/wondering how different the fish around Mideel are given the much more pronounced Lifestream...). Heh, I can't remember the precise details of those rumours, but I think it was under certain conditions you could descend in the submarine into the trench and into a new area. There might have been an additional summon or Weapon - I forget - and I think it endured a bit longer then some fake rumours as it really does look like there is more below the bottom of the ocean/the rift is clearly big enough for the submarine to go lower... It at least had more going for it then the rumour that you could (*somehow*) get onto Meteor and there was something else up there to do.
Heh - that is a good point the dream is supposed to make Aeris seem mysterious (very much the "Woah, has she always been able to do this kind of thing?" on the first play-through), but her personality still has to be a factor and yeah, she's going to want some logic for herself. I do like the idea he's not simply off-screen, as while the game implies this, it doesn't feel quite right for Cloud to be viewing the scene third person before entering it himself. And I like the justifications for why Cloud is taking so long to awaken/Aeris helping him understand its okay now.
Might have meandered a bit/rambled a tad there. Concentration complete gone this evening...
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-30 03:34 am (UTC)...lmfao it's friendship that keeps tripping me up now as I realized that I made Tifa afraid everyone would eventually part in the Gold Saucer chapter, while Aerith is so sure here that everyone will help Cloud and Tifa would be hurt by any of their deaths. They're not...necessarily contradicting, since 1) different characters, different perspectives and 2) Aerith viewing them as good people doesn't mean she thinks they're going to all stick tight together (and that they wouldn't doesn't mean it wouldn't hurt for their lives to be cut short) but I do wonder if something needs to be tweaked. In the Gold Saucer chapter it can probably be tweaked to be a bit more explicitly that Tifa thinks Cloud and Aerith will be caught up in each other and her own jealous feelings might get in the way. But yeah, something I have to think about... (I haven't really started the Cloud section yet and only poked a little at the part where Tifa is lulled to sleep. ahhhh I want to just finish and at the same time actually writing is ...:|;; I keep stumping myself pretty much.)
But yeah that does raise some complications for how/why/if Barret and Tifa are split off from the others at that stage, and what happens otherwise (if I remember the plan right, wasn't Aeris going to fall back into Hojo's clutches at this point?)
Yyyyyes general idea was Aerith was going to go back with Shinra her terms being to help the company purely by speaking to the Planet and trying to calm the WEAPONs or at least make a warning when they approach populated areas...knowing enough about Shinra that she's not really that surprised when they hand her off to Hojo (and on that note I kind of keep thinking too about what she might have to say at the Northern Crater... like the scene where Tifa is trying to shout to Cloud when Sephiroth's completely broken her and realizes he can't hear her voice, I imagine if Aerith's there too it's a similar deal and maybe it's only the girls who can hear each other (Barret/Nanaki doesn't seem to be able to hear Tifa either, as it would probably have given them pause to hear Tifa shouting at Cloud to stop when he's asking for the Black Materia); so they're effectively muted to everyone else but it doesn't stop them from trying and I imagine when Hojo tells Cloud "shut up, miserable failure" Aerith just absolutely explodes at him because he's always been like this, he's always dehumanizing people and hurting them without any care--and then Cloud is levitating up to Sephiroth and both girls are shouting at him again. Still doesn't work. :( ). One idea on the even-further-AUing is that Tifa for some reason is with Aerith... Except I don't know why Shinra would really take her conscious (I can see her insisting on going with Aerith to make sure Shinra's not pulling a fast one on Aerith even with Aerith going "NO" at her, but it seems much more likely Rufus would nix that as taking all three of Aerith, Barret and Tifa makes some coordinated resistance more likely, and leaving Barret behind makes the execution for public blame idea weaker--one woman isn't going to seem as likely as some horrible public threat as a duo (and sadly for Barret it is pretty much canon that he comes off the much more threatening one just by appearance alone). ...The only AU change I can really think works here is a brief-lived one, at least from Tifa's POV--she still gets knocked out, and Shinra will provide care for her and allow Barret to stay and Aerith comes with them--Aerith insists on helping heal Tifa. They grant this as a show of goodwill but still only intend this to be until Tifa regains consciousness; once she does, Aerith only has a brief time to talk with her until the surveillance camera gets checked and they realize oh, hey, the prisoners are awake to die and Aerith gets whisked out of the room on some excuse before Rufus reveals to Tifa and Barret the real reason they're there.
Haha, yeah, AC probably did have resurrection ideas being brought up at least once or in passing, just to be shot down.
Tseng I find very weird as, while Elena's line might have been badly phrased, there's still oddities--first, wasn't the translation done by the Japanese? Most of the translation errors always seemed to be idiot English, not a lack of understanding of what was going on in the original version. So while it's possible that they chose a bad English phrase not totally understanding its implication, it doesn't seem quite as likely... Second, why does Tseng never come up again in the game if he's alive? Even a casual comment would be nice. But then, you could probably argue the same about his death, that that should have also gotten comment from Reno or Rude.
But the third weird thing...why is Elena even angry at Cloud? Think of the original game scenario--if Tseng was supposed to have actually survived in that case, before compilation invented new people, Elena would have been the one to rescue him, being the nearest Shinra personnel. Are we to assume that despite being shown still conscious when Cloud goes on he then lost consciousness from the Temple of Ancients onward to Icicle Inn so that Elena never heard who actually did it? Even if he wasn't conscious, wouldn't Elena realize from the wound that hey, that's not the mark of a broadsword?
If we're assuming Elena is just THAT much a rookie that she thinks a stab wound from Masamune is from Cloud's broadsword (Yuffie's shuriken?? Cid's spear??) I suppose that works. But she knew they were following Sephiroth and that he had a possibility to be there too, so being that oblivious to realizing it was him seems pretty dumb. Going by OGC, Elena should have seen Tseng's body and realized it was Sephiroth...unless she plain didn't see the body, crushed in the temple.
So I think either Tseng's survival is a retcon, or the whole scenario in Icicle Inn wasn't well thought out in a way that isn't connected to translation.
And yeah, Case of Shinra definitely seemed more like badfic at some points.
at the same time, I did wonder if you were implying that Bone Village was more of a nickname and the place has an actual name of its own?
Ah ah, no, I did mean she heard "Bone Village" and thought "hmm fitting" and poof! it went out of her mind.
lmfao yes if anything KH is proof that Aerith does not need to be a disney princess. And oh yes! The sea rift is so, sooo much more plausible than the idea of getting onto Meteor (the idea of another summon is pretty believable since the sub is how you get both the Materia and Key of the Ancients).
I suppose it is possible that Cloud could be viewing the scene third person, as sort of him needing some time to "enter" the dream Aerith made, but I still just liked connecting it to the whole "don't wake me" line.
Haha I feel like my concentration's been gone for a while now.
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-30 10:14 pm (UTC)Haha - very true that Tifa's stance and Aeris's stance aren't necessarily contradicting due to their different perspectives/Tifa's more pessimistic view of the situations versus Aeris's much more optimistic - and yeah that Aeris thinks thet are all good people does not mean they will stick together (they've known Vincent and Cid for a relatively very short time) - but yeah it is still going to hurt to lose any of them, no matter how recently they met. Hmm... yeah that tweak sounds about right for Tifa's mindset at the Gold Saucer; her feeling she's going to be edged out/will get in the way if she stays as close/is not going to do herself any good by staying that close. Ah, I know that feeling about writing - really wanting to get it finished, but then some days, its just so hard to even begin/so much other things to investigate (I suspect you'll have seen, but just in case, there's an intriguing Rapture set BioShock Infinite DLC on the way, which sounds like it has a lot of potential and gives you control of Elizabeth (oh and reportedly Infinite 2 is just not going to happen. Probably a good thing, but now I'm hoping the Lutece's make it into the DLC...))
Ah - yeah, I still like Aeris returning to Shinra on strictly her terms, but never being surprised (so very, very disappointed, but not surprised) that they do hand her to Hojo like that. That's an interesting question for the Nort Crater - I like the detail that Aeris can still hear Tifa even if the other's can't - and yeah they would have reacted more if they'd heard her yells. And yeah, Aeris is going to explode at Hojo; she remembers what he was like before, and this is all uttely typical of him.
Hmm... taking Aeris with Tifa and Barret is tempting for the increased AU possibilities; but you're right, the motivations of Rufus don't quite work/as you said with the publically stated reason they want Aeris back to talk to the Planet/warn about Weapon approaches, it seems odder to lock her up with the Avalanche members. That said, I think the idea of it being a condition of Aeris's return works quite nicely so she does have until Tifa wakes up to stay with her and Barret (and actually, you could then use this to reduce the time it takes for Tifa to recover with Aeris able to assist the process. And she'll be torn between spending more time with Tifa even though she's unconcious and getting her awake only for her to be dragged away from her. I just remember you were wary of having Tifa be unconcious for seven days so rapidly after Sephiroth's attack at the City of the Ancients).
That is a good point about Elena's line in VII. From what I remember the VII translation was done entirely by Square themselves - and yeah most of the errors are slightly wonky grammar/the odd bad phrasing, but never noticeably inaccurate/misunderstood (which would be a greater risk for an external translator). So yeah, while it is possible that the phrasing is off in Elena's words, its not as likely to have gotten the meaning so wrong to confuse the situation. And yeah; Tseng's lack of in-game subsequent appearance is probably the strongest reinforcement of his death - it feels like he should have stopped the Turks from challenging Avalanche that final time, or tried to get Rufus out of his office, or helped Reeve escape confinement, or almost anything. Though that is also true that Reno and Rude never comment on it either.
...somehow a load of this just never occured to me; Elena being angry is confusing - and yeah before the Compilation (/two active Cait Siths at the Temple), Elena would have to be the one to get him away from the Temple - and yeah, its a big stretch to imply he never explained to Elena that it was Sephiroth who near killed him. The sword wound... is a bit trickier as Cloud does have some finer bladed swords I think so it might not be quite as obvious that the wound can't be from his normal weapon. That's a weak argument though.
Hmm... yeah while Elena is still quite rookie-like, I think even by that stage she'd be much more used to the Turks way of doing things to not make that mistake with the wounding, but it is possible that its the turning point and she becomes more serious as a result of that incident. But yeah, that it was possibly Sephiroth should have ocurred to her. Tseng getting crushed by the Temple would sort that a bit, but it does feel that unless Tseng crawled elsewhere, Cloud might have taken the second to grab him as they're fleeing out of the Temple.
Hehe - I think the easiest conclusion is that Tseng's survival is a retcon, fuelled by a slight narrative hitch in the way they presented Icicle Inn (or else it was an overlooked line from a point where Tseng was meant to survive, and when developing AC someone realised they'd not actively declared him dead. Then someone else nuisance pointed out that no one saw Rufus's body, and so...)
Ah - my mistake with Bone Village (though, like with Icicle Inn, it kind of feels that these places should have a name that feels more like a place name. Well, admittedly Bone Village feels like Rocket Town - it was never conceived as a settlement, it kind of developed as a result/they nicknamed their settlement and it stuck. Admittedly that could be true for Icicle Inn - originally there was just the Inn as a way-point and the other houses came later...)
Heh - good point on the sub. We could add the crashed Gelnika as well as things connected to it. And that rift just looks like it should be accessible.
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-31 05:14 pm (UTC)Yeah, I saw about the DLC! Well, I saw a gifset of meeting Elizabeth in Rapture, which I figured must be from a DLC. I'm curious to see what plot there is even though the closest I'll ever get to experiencing it is Let's Play or summaries...
and actually, you could then use this to reduce the time it takes for Tifa to recover with Aeris able to assist the process. And she'll be torn between spending more time with Tifa even though she's unconcious and getting her awake only for her to be dragged away from her. I just remember you were wary of having Tifa be unconcious for seven days so rapidly after Sephiroth's attack at the City of the Ancients
Mm, yeah. At the same time I mostly find the period of unconsciousness annoying because it winds up with her doing nothing, and if I get Tifa into that situation in Shinra custody...she's still going to wind up doing nothing until the execution/Sapphire WEAPON attack. (Unless I turn things really AU with Barret and Tifa escaping on their own, and I'm not sure how I'd have them meeting up with the others again and that's just more and more complicated.) Though it may still have potential as an opportunity for something... at least the scene together when she wakes up would be sweet (kind of bittersweet with Aerith knowing that aaaaaany minute now...)
...You know. With the Elena and Tseng thing now I kind of wonder if Elena's supposed to be pulling a Hope and blaming the person who is very obviously NOT TO BLAME but was involved and is much more easily punishable than the real responsible party. ...Her dialogue is kind of going a step too far for that unless she reaaaaaally convinced herself it could be one of Cloud's fine-bladed weapons. (Elena...writers...?! /_\) It does feel like a "hey, we never actually SAID he was dead" deal that chose to brush Icicle Inn's weirdness aside.
Yeah, I think Bone Village and Rocket Town are both makeshift settlements that just came into being rather than being planned--and that does sound right for Icicle Inn (I always do wonder when looking at that one if it shouldn't have another name as a town though--which is funny because I don't even think of it for the other two. Probably because they at least say 'village' or 'town'--that one's talking about just the inn!!)
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-07-31 08:36 pm (UTC)I was actually considering waiting for a LP for the DLC as well; mostly as I was so put off by the combat in Infinite I'm not entirely encouraged about going through that again. That said, maybe it'll be different due to Rapture, and I am really intrigued as to what's going to happen. Also the meeting with Elizabeth looks like its done to give the impression its a returning BioShock character and there's a lot of speculation if this is an AU with the Infinite cast in place of BioShock cast, or they're additional and previously unseesn Rapture denizens.
I do agree about the unconcious period being annoying (I skipped straight over that last time) as it does mean she does nothing for a week - and yeah would then be stuck until Sapphire WEAPON turns up. The AU for the escape is intriguing, but yeah, getting everyone together again is a bit trickier. Oh! And yeah having Aeris there as well really would make it bittersweet when Tifa wakes up and Aeris is uncomfortably aware that they could be coming for her any second.
That is possible that Elena is reacting similarly to Hope like that; Cloud and co. are much less daunting to deal with then Sephiroth would or could be... Though yeah, the dialogue is a bit too far unless as you say she is completely convinced. I wonder if it's... not so much different in Japanese, its just the blame is easier to understand (another point to get to in the re-translation of the game. As well as finding out what on Earth Johnny says).
Heh - yeah Icicle Inn has always stuck out as being the oddest named settlement for me too; it really feels that place should have had another name; and yeah, never thought that about the other two - they sound righter as place names, and have a right sense to them when the circumstances of their founding is considered/conjectured.
(now my brain has gone silly: postal delivery to the area. The package is addressed to Icicle Inn - the postal worker is pretty sure this is for the Inn and not just the area. The staff at Icicle Inn open the packagae and find six copies of Loveless inside and wearily send someone to tell the red-headed stranger that the delivery company forgot to put his name and address on the package again (...brain you confuse me; why Genesis of all people?! Well, needed something obviously not intended for the inn to be delivered... rambly...))
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-08-01 06:58 pm (UTC)I saw a pic with the Booker Dewitt Detective Agency (or however that went) door in it--isn't he the playable character? I mean he could easily not recognize Elizabeth because he's had his life with Anna and she doesn't look the same (and this Booker's not clued in to alternate realities). But then again I wasn't looking too closely at what the pics I came across did show of the player's character so I could be completely wrong and it's another Bioshock character. It'll just be interesting to see what they do (though, ack, at the combat being fun--I do remember other complaints about it but the genre's the completely wrong one for me to judge anyway).
Sometimes I feel like I should just go through the whole FF7 Japanese script just to satisfy my curiosity. Then I realize with how much Japanese I don't now, this would drive me pretty well insane (slang and casual language would just. no. no.)
Ahaha the Loveless takeover has gotten to you. But yeah, the address confusion does seem like it'd be a thing with that sort of name.
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-08-01 08:07 pm (UTC)Ah, I was a bit confused on the Infinite DLC too - as I saw presumably Booker walking through his door and into Rapture - and yeah I assumed he'd be the playable character again. But I'm sure I saw another comment about how different it would be to have control of Elizabeth for the DLC. I might have just gotten confused. Either way, I'm intrigued as to how it's going to work - and a return to Rapture is very tempting/the setting is really cool... Haha - I think I griped multiple times about the combat, so that might just be me; I've gotten more fond of stealth games then blasting away at enemies...
(actually, I have just realised the real disappointment with the DLC as announced - as I think that's it; one multiplayer and the two part Rapture set one - is that we're unlikely to get anything on the vigours and where and how they came about)
Ah, reading the Japanese script would be cool, but yeah, I can see that being problematic. A friend of a friend apparently was having troubles with FFXII in Japanese because they were using a slightly archaic dialect in the speech or something like that.
...yeah Loveless got to me a bit there. I must flee it!
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-08-04 04:41 pm (UTC)Though yeah, a Rapture-set DLC pretty much rules out worldbuilding for Columbia, which is a bit disappointing.
I did hear about the archaic dialect for XII--I'm pretty sure Reno alone would drive me nuts in VII, given I've heard he has verbal tics in here (actually I'm sure a number of minor characters probably have verbal tics/language gags tied into them, given how they were translated...).
Re: this is a lot of rambling
Date: 2013-08-04 06:13 pm (UTC)And Infinite 2 is outright not happening apparently - unless the guy in charge leaves again like with BioShock (as I doubt he wanted BioShock 2 either), so we are going to be left with a frustrating hole in the world-building... Unless the two new chapters tie back into Columbia again, which isn't impossible given the in-game time-shifts and the whole nature of the parallel universes.
I confess to not really picking up on tics for Reno (at least in Advent Children) - except for the 'yo' at the end of sentences which some fanfic writers now seem to employ all the time. But yeah, I would imagine there are a lot of other dialects in use in the game; Caith Sith/Reeve is the major one I remember...)
Re: this is a lot of rambling
From:Re: this is a lot of rambling
From:Re: this is a lot of rambling
From:Re: this is a lot of rambling
From:actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-27 08:29 pm (UTC)Oh, yes, I can definitely see that innocence in sweetheart, which I think makes it more fitting as Tifa's preferred term for a love... though yeah, she'll come to accept "soulmate" a bit more in time. And that's true that "sweetheart" is not necessarily mutual.
Slight language differences aren't always obvious, so feel free to keep pointing stuff out when it sounds off to you--I'm pretty sure I've done the exact same thing with phrases that are perfectly correct.
lmfao Cloud and Tifa both hate the "go alone" part of this plan. Meanwhile Aerith is pretty much going "oh come on it's the best plan I got"
I do keep thinking that at some point Tifa and Aerith are going to be due for an argument given how things are going, even without blatantly hypocritical statements (...also I felt really bad in writing the Aerith section with how she keeps thinking she's doing the right thing and this will keep Cloud and Tifa out of trouble and it's like hahaha TIFA ALMOST KILLED, CLOUD OUT OF HIS HEAD, NOT EVEN SURE SHE HELPED THE PLANET it gets better eventually...) Mostly it's figuring out when this would actually happen, given the lecture Tifa wanted to give at the altar got...cut short.
I definitely wrote an Aerith-centric thing. >_>
I just imagine when Cloud and Aerith get left alone by Tifa Cloud's thinking that it's because he is in deep, deep trouble with what he did at the Temple and he needs to start apologizing to Aerith NOW and Aerith's just like "Cloud. Cloud, calm down. No one's mad. TIFA? CAN YOU COME BACK BEFORE CLOUD THINKS WE DON'T LIKE HIM NOW?"
"It really isn't quite the right moment"
...I think I have a bit of guilty pleasure for humor even during serious times. Or maybe that's just with certain characters (Aerith...)
Ahaha yeah in Tifa's notebook the 15 minutes = 15 minutes thing would be a very slight footnote with "SCHEDULE-MAKING" and then meanwhile "don't use magic to subdue your loved ones" is so big it just takes over its page and is underlined. several times. Did not like that.
...Kind of amused to think Tifa's notebook was actually supposed to be a record of their trip so like there's a bunch of notes on general musing things and some passages about Cloud (but so very, very vague because omg what if he found it and read it, or someone else did. she wouldn't live it down) and then there's passages where Aerith takes over because it's like "we were doing this today and it was really wonderful and Aerith is the best girl friend I've ever had
and I kind of wish we were more" and then the very occasional "I wish she wouldn't do _____"and then it gets to the second time at the Gold Saucer and the Temple and Gongaga and it's just an absolute mess of "Aerith why do you do this to me we need to talk about ALL THESE THINGS"
Yeah, the lullaby has definitely won out for that moment; I might write that snippet of Tifa's section next before setting out to do Cloud's.
...And haha, yeah, Cloud's section might definitely be the tricky one with figuring out what I want to do while keeping a consistent POV. we shall see. I can see Tifa thinking fair weather friendship a bit which is kind of. ouch. on both sides really, Cloud for her thinking that of him and her for thinking that's how Cloud sees her.
Also I realized sometime on Thursday the game script itself suggests Cloud doesn't remember everything that happened in the temple, when he first blacks out--before the dream starts in the forest: "Everything is white... What did I do? I don't remember anything... My memory... since when...? If everything's a dream, don't wake me." So yeah, definitely going with his memory of handing the Black materia and hurting Aerith being in fragments or coming back that way, so at the time of the dream he remembers he let things go really wrong, but not exactly how or that he himself hurt Aerith.
I think the Sephiroth encouraging Cloud to go to Aeris before Tifa feeds back into the tumblr conversation of Cloud needing a justification for his impulses - at that point he's compelled but he honestly also wants to be the one to talk to Aeris, but does back down at Tifa's request. The second movement curtailed by Barret is more blatant manipulation and that's going to worry him somewhat that he's agreed to not go up there, but his body suddenly overrode his mind...
Yes, that's pretty much exactly it; the first part is an impulse like as he's had all along, and the second one is more along the lines of when his body is just outright taken over.
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-27 09:27 pm (UTC)...haha. Actually when you point out a sentence doesn't sound right, its so far been always correct - often as I wrote something hurriedly or half-asleep and it seemed to make sense at the time, but is in actuality some tortuous phrase which makes no sense.
I'm all for Aeris and Tifa having an argument; as much as they will be happy and contented, friction/misunderstandings are natural parts of relationships - its one of the aspects that is really infuriating when Case of Tifa is used as anti-Cloti evidence because they fight. Couples fight, they get angry and make-up. They might split for a while, try to see other people and get back together. Not to say CoT doesn't have other issues (we've been over those a few times), its just seemingly that Clerith can be this perfect, completely understanding, stress-free relationship - mostly due to circumstance/time constraints while Cloti is not all plain-sailing, but it never has to be. Bit of a tangent there.
Heh - ah, but Aeris was not to know Tifa would make such a sacrifice for her, or quite what Sephiroth was planning, so in her own mind she feels justified. And yeah, she's going to hit a real bad patch after this, but things will get better (*wishing for deliriously happy once things are sorted, the OT3 is together. Something like how Cloud/Zack/Aeris were behaving in 'The Sky...' just before Aeris, Tifa, Marlene and Merlin go to the Disney castle, and the description of the other two not wanting to let go, her getting dishevelled, but *glowing**)
Haha - like the thought of Cloud and Aeris left together, and he's thinking he's in deep trouble and Aeris tries to mollify him and calls Tifa back...
Humour during serious times actually feels really appropriate for characters like Aeris, so I'm encouraging it!
I like all the descriptions of Tifa's note-book and those two examples. I think don't use magic to subdue your loved ones needs to be across two pages in big letters. And then Tifa makes Aeris write out in the available spaces later on so she learns...
The idea of the notebook being, or at least starting as a journal is a nice one too, and I like the evasive/oblique notes about Clouod, and the much more honest Aeris ones.
The fair-weather friend thing is indeed a little bit ouch, but it seemed to work from Tifa's mindset - she implies he'll gravitate towards Aeris, and in her absence he'll gravitate towards her. It connects with her view of their relationship as a contest and that she's already lost, and she's not even a consolation prize, she's a temporary consolation prize until Cloud gets the person he wants. That said this is a sticky notion to bring up and then reverse completely later on...
Ah - that's interesting the game-script canonically has Cloud uncertain of the events at the Temple which does nicely feed into how you're doing his mindset - and makes it a lot easier for the aftermath.
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-28 07:02 pm (UTC)I could've sworn I haven't realized about a regional thing at least once. At any rate seriously, feel free to keep telling me if something doesn't sound right to you; sometimes things are technically correct and still not the best choice.
That's very true that friction/arguments are natural parts of relationships--and it helps make the fictional ones more interesting, even if we wish they wouldn't happen in our real ones XD; And oh, Clerith shouldn't be completely perfect. They're very different people and definitely have different ways of looking at things, even if they also have good chemistry with each other.
Something like how Cloud/Zack/Aeris were behaving in 'The Sky...' just before Aeris, Tifa, Marlene and Merlin go to the Disney castle, and the description of the other two not wanting to let go, her getting dishevelled, but *glowing*
Marlene or Kairi? But oh, yeah, that really was a sweet description. I can't say I'm so good at moments like that but I do want to give them some happy times after all this trouble.
And then Tifa makes Aeris write out in the available spaces later on so she learns...
LMFAO yes. Time for some lines young lady ("I'm older than you!" "You weren't acting like it :| /POINTS TO PAPER")
The idea of a Tifa journal during the trip actually sounds like a neat little idea in itself... she or Aerith are the two most likely to keep diaries and it'd be kind of interesting to see what each of them would cover (aaaaaaand then my mind started making this bittersweet aerti with both their entries gradually showing feelings growing for each other but never quite making up their minds to say it and Tifa's last entry is her finding Aerith's journal after she died, bawwwww)
Yeah, the fairweather friend is definitely hard to both build up as a valid belief for Tifa to have and then go "but of course that's not how Cloud feels!" I mean it's possible for Cloud to be kind of a clod with his emotional ineptitude but...it'd definitely have to be carefully built up in that he is trying to be a good friend to her, it's just coming off wrong because he's also floundering with his identity crisis and because he just doesn't understand the social tact of some situations (I mean even if he was told there was a competition between Aerith and Tifa... "what are they competing over??" lol Cloud.)
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-28 08:06 pm (UTC)And I'd say the same; tell me if something doesn't sound right (well you have done, but please continue!) - you're right, technically correct but not necessarily the best choice.
Definitely agree that friction/arguments are wanted in fictional relationships (and oh yes, to avoid those in real ones...). And very true! Clerith shouldn't be perfect for all the reasons you listed; it just feels like there's an expectation of this if Cloti can be attacked for a few cross words/lost tempers. Its just again we never saw the couple together long enough to see the moment when one or other snaps, or just has a spectacularly bad day...
Oh dammit! Yeah, Kairi (I should worry she got interchanged with Marlene there). But hooray for happy times later on!
The lines/"But I'm older than you" just made me laugh, so that's be great to see if it could be worked in. Actually the idea of the Aerti fic with the two journal is a bit like 'Love Not Often' as Tifa does final Aeris's journal after the fact (after AC in fact/it then gets magically filled in). This is different though, as the couple get together prior to the end of disc 1 in that fic, and its not Tifa later finding out how Aeris felt, and that would be so sad! It actually half reminds me of another fic where it turns out Aeris is illiterate and Tifa teaches her to read and write, and Tifa is staying up later and later and abusing Cure materia to keep herself awake so she can keep helping... and then feels so betrayed at Enchantment Night. But yes, I like the idea of it, and I don't think its been executed in quite that way that I've run across.
Thinking about it, the fair-weather friend situation can be made to work, but it'd have to be done in the right order; basically I think you can have Tifa coming to that conclusion from his actions, and have Cloud's POV to make clear that's not how he sees it (still leaving with Tifa not feeling great towards Cloud, but later events like entering his mind would clear that up a bit).
Haha - yeah, Cloud really would say that if told there was a competition between the two girls...
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-28 09:15 pm (UTC)Even in game there are a few moments where Aerith loses patience with Cloud (I don't think it's ever true in the opposite direction, though it is easy to picture him finally getting mad that she won't listen when all he's trying to do is keep her safe). So yeah I do think they would have arguments (at times I like imagining them having spectacular arguments and then making up so...)
Haha while "Marlene" did throw me for a minute (was wondering if she cameo'd and I missed it) it's pretty easy to see how the two got switched with Scribblr's fic being so FF7-heavy--they're both the young girl of the group.
I just keep picturing with the lines that Aerith looks to Cloud for help with Tifa and he just puts on a serious face and says as leader of the group, he thinks Tifa's idea sounds pretty fair and she better get started. Nooo winning this one here, Aerith. XD
The magically filling diary always seemed weird to me... yeah this diary would just be an ordinary one. I can imagine Tifa being frustrated and upset at first because it is sad that they didn't figure it out while they could have had something, so her last journal entry of the time is bitter...and then maybe a calmer one some months later as an epilogue (though it's always possible to just end on the bitter note).
Actually after some more thought I don't think the fairweather friend CAN work, not without going AU in its own way; like, you mention events like entering his mind would clear that up a bit, and that really does seem like the first time things could get cleared up, but that's after she's been determined to find Cloud and then stay by his side and care for him through the end of the world, and there's also the way she's so sure that he would say things that would reassure her after the execution. From that faith I don't think it'd really work to be showing Tifa as thinking Cloud is a poor friend ...which now I think I may have to relook earlier portions over and make sure that most of her doubt is in her chances of romance and the weirdness of the memory conflict but not in him as a friend.
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-28 10:00 pm (UTC)Good point; I had blanked on Aeris getting ticked off with Cloud (the not wanting to involve her because she's a girl at her house, potentially that difficult to answer question in Costa del Sol...); but yeah very easy to see him getting mad that she won't listen as he's trying to keep her safe. I like the thought of spectacular arguments, but they cool down super-fast and make up just as fast...
I think I was also conflating 'But that was...' with 'The Sky...' which didn't help. But yeah, Kairi is in a similar position and with such a FFVII influence... At least you did know the moment I meant despite that goof!
Haha - yeah Aeris is not winning that argument ever.
Oh, the magically filling diary seemed weird to me too, and the ordinary one sounds better! And yeah, I can definitely see Tifa's last entry being bitter that Aeris never said anything/she herself never spoke up and just how different would things have been... (kinda torn on the point to leave it on actually. The bitter one sounds really right, like she can't bring herself to ever re-visit the diary after this entry - this is her last thoughts about Aeris and she's going to have to try and forget/move on and as much as she meant everything she wrote before she can't cope with reminders - at least not yet. So that's it, its a pained goodbye to Aeris and the nagging wondering of what might have been. But then the calmer one would still fit - its been some months later, the world is saved, things are calming down (/optional ignoring of AC here) and Tifa misses Aeris too much that she has to revisit the diary just to remind herself of her friend. So she opens it up, reads cover to cover... and just feels uncomfortable reading that last entry. She meant every word, but she hasn't been able to stay angry/mad/bitter. She knows Aeris never meant to die/never wanted to die/never needed to die, that if either had said anything nothing would have changed. And had she lived they might have one day been able to talk about their feelings and things would have been different. And she's reationalised that just as Aeris never said anything about her feelings, she didn't either, so they're both to blame/Tifa knows they'll be reunited in the Lifestream, but Aeris would want her to live first. So Tifa writes one final entry (maybe in both?), a much calmer, sad, but not bitter goodbye to her friend)
Got a little rambly there (also; much like 48 Exposures, there is a real appeal to these canon-spliced artifacts that the characters could plausibly have had. The twin diaries have a nice rightness to them. Suddenly I'm thinking they both start in Kalm - while gathering supplies, they spot them in a shop and both decide to keep a travel diary. Oh! And maybe the idea was at some future point they swap so they can see the other's perspective, and both hit on this being the way to confess to the other but writing it in, only that back-fires so sadly).
Ahhh! Good point about the fairweather friend. Yeah, that isn't going to mesh quite right there; so yeah Tifa can't be in any doubt of Cloud as a friend - just in terms of romance/the love triangle/the memory conflict (and that does work nicely as I think Tifa will attribute her seeming failure in the romance stakes because she doesn't feel able to speak up and tell Cloud how she feels/doesn't feel able to with the memory conflict).
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-30 01:51 pm (UTC)...I may have been thinking about how arguments would go in a threesome living arrangement too much. At any rate there are definitely arguments Aerith will never ever win like "but I went alone to keep you two safe--" "NO."
Yeah, that seems exactly right for mindset for both "final" entries--I think the second ending would depend on whether or not Tifa kept the diaries, or if Aerith's (and possibly hers as well) were thrown away/destroyed while she was still bitter about it (...mental image of Cloud coming to the campfire to see a journal in there and all Tifa will say about it is that it was dry paper and she couldn't find more kindling). Depending on just how personal Aerith's diary was, if she did keep it, it might be something that eventually gets shared with others--Elmyra, or maybe the rest of AVALANCHE. But yeah starting in Kalm and it being a shared idea seems right for both of them keeping one, and from there the idea of a swap is pretty easy.
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-30 08:18 pm (UTC)Oh! Definitely agree that Aeris at her angriest is the very calm, very composed and very clear - and Tifa now wishing for the yelling again (heh - and yeah what is Cloud doing that has angered Aeris so much?)
Hehe - its good to think about how an argument in that setup would work - and it makes me again wonder how often they would occur even with the participants really striving to communicate as clearly and openly as possible to prevent later complications. And yeah, Aeris is never winning the wanting to keep them both safe argument (and by extension, neither is Cloud if he ever tries to pull something like that).
Oh! that would be really sad if Tifa threw away her diary like that or burnt it. Though, I can see this being she burns her own out of frustration/sorrow/anger/bitterness, but can't bring herself to burn Aeris's as well (so in fic form, interspersed entries from along the journey/a moment in the North when the weather is freezing and they need warmth so Tifa sacrifices her own diary, then later post-game she writes the epilogue?). So she does eventually revisit it and really regrets burning her own... Hmm... if Aeris really is going to confess her feelings in the diary, it feels like Tifa would share some parts rather then others - especially if there is an expectation of the other reading it eventually and that kind of love confession is included.
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-31 01:52 pm (UTC)lmfao if Tifa gets recalled as referee--well it depends. I can see some matters coming up that still don't involve her because it really is an opinion difference between Cloud and Aerith that just isn't a factor in day-to-day stuff (and then she scolds them both for dragging her into it instead of working it out between them) but then yeah, there'd be the stuff where she does need to weigh in because it legitimately affects their relationship. And then it's like ffffffff having to pick a side, why.
(Though I can also imagine that at first all of them feel some need to play peacekeeper if a fight comes up between the other two because they've never been in this arrangement before and they're afraid of things souring somehow--which if the other two don't work things out between them might really happen. Aerith is happy to leave Cloud and Tifa to it as long as they're actually talking about the problem (heaven help them if they aren't), Tifa wants to play peacekeeper all the time at first and comes to realize 1) that's tiring 2) Cloud and Aerith don't always appreciate a moderator and 3) it probably is better for them to work through some things on their own. Cloud reacting to Tifa and Aerith fighting... he's probably torn between wanting to help fix it now and fretting he's going to somehow make it blow up even worse. Cloooouuuuud.)
Haha yeah AC Cloud would be in trouble too with Tifa and Aerith on trying to keep them out of his problems. I can kiiiind of see Tifa doing this sometime, not that it ever came up with Cloud or Aerith but the whole deal with Don Corneo (she says herself Barret told her to leave it alone and not get involved with the Don, now here she is in Wall Market on her own, if Cloud and Aerith hadn't happened to see and go after her she probably would have gotten dumped in the sewers with Aps on her own), but I think the circumstances would have to be really specific to get her doing that, she seems to default a lot more to doing things as a group.
...I'm kind of blanking on ideas about the journal thing right now. /shakes brain
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-07-31 08:19 pm (UTC)Good point; Tifa as referee will be very conditional based on circumstances, though I do like her scolding them both for dragging her into a difference of opinion. And yeah definitely some occasions when she has to get involved as it will impact all three of them. And choosing sides could be so fraught... Oh! And sometimes they have the worst rows where all three of them wind up on opposing points and Yuffie or Nanaki have to come in and get them talking again (not sure what has lead to that kind of melt-down admittedly).
I like the note about the anxiety, and the perceived need for the peacekeeper/getting the argument resolved as fast, as cleanly and amicably as possible - the seeming risk if two of them do fall out disastorously what that will do to the three of them. Though over time they realise they're stronger then that, and nice little things like Tifa and Cloud can keep arguing as just expressing themselves is good enough. Definitely agree Tifa would go for the peacekeeper role at first but then ceasing that. Haha! Yeah, Cloud is super-reluctant to interfere in an Aeris/Tifa fight like that - definite fears of making it worse somehow/pre-emptively gets the sofa ready for himself and the spare room for Tifa as they wind up needing to calm down between them (...for some reason I just see the bedroom being very much Aeris's despite them normally sharing it. It's her domain in a way. In any case, during the night Aeris or Tifa decide they're being silly and so sneak into the other's bed apologetically, and then proceed to sneak downstairs to the sofa and cram themselves on along with Cloud).
True about Tifa, she might try very occasionally to keep the other two away from her problems after how Wall Market worked, but yeah, circumstances would be a big factor.
I had an unusual idea about the journal idea, or at least how to write it; how about co-authoring it? I've never tried this, and am not entirely sure how to go about it... Bit of a random thought admittedly...
Re: actual comment response
Date: 2013-08-01 05:05 pm (UTC)...Weirdly this isn't examined in AC at all that I can recall, and in Case of Tifa it's only at most hinted at if you assume it part of what he's talking about in "lives lost"--but the focus is much more on Aerith's death and AVALANCHE's activities (which makes sense, it's Tifa's novella). But if I had Aerith survive and things go relatively the same, he would still feel some guilt, toward Aerith and Zack personally over Zack's death but also toward the death toll in Midgar. I mean, I assume he also realized that he wasn't exactly in control of himself, Sephiroth is really the one ultimately at fault, but guilt doesn't go away immediately just because you have logic (and really that logic pretty much extends to Aerith's death--the sequence of events that led to her death involve Sephiroth taking control of Cloud twice). "AC mode" involves a lot of clamming up though as well and I want to say with Aerith's directness as a bit of counterbalance for both him and Tifa it, yeah, probably wouldn't turn out as bad as in canon. (Uuuunless, assuming Geostigma still happens, he somehow finds out how Sephiroth's consciousness still exists. Because he didn't find that out in canon and I presume it'd upset him biiiiig time.)
(And now I am thinking even more of these things because I've been telling an rp buddy I'd try out their game and I'm thinking of playing Cloud... maybe from CoT, before he contracts Geostigma)
If we were going along compilation living arrangements + Aerith I think Marlene would be yelling at them all to get along again first XD and then they have Barret yelling at them too because the hell are they doing, getting his baby girl upset--but yeah, I can imagine a very odd occasion where one of the others calls their household and realizes "oh god you're all fighting? How the @$#! did you manage that" (I have to admit I'm curious how Cid would come down on one of their fights--I imagine he'd just be yelling at them all to use their heads and not go off half-cocked, stuff like that).
lmfao the mental image of Cloud walking into the house at night, hearing Tifa and Aerith fighting and automatically gravitating toward the couch just cracks me up. SELF-COUCHING (eventually one of the girls realizes what he's doing and they're probably looking at each other like "we should tell Cloud not to do that. Or maybe keep our fights a little more quiet so he doesn't spook like a chocobo in the wild"
they are slowly working on taming him and convincing him that the nice house really is okaaaaay, nothing bad is going to happen).I can see Aerith's dominion over the bedroom--partly because Cloud and Tifa don't like kicking her out, partly because Aerith if nothing else is stubborn and her attitude in an argument could easily be less "I'm leaving!" and more "no YOU get out, feel free to come back with a nicer attitude" (probably depends what the issue is--I have had her just entirely leave the house during hard discussions because she felt sucker-punched by the issue and wasn't sure how she should react (the time Cloud broke up with her and Zack because Denzel had arrived was like this) but if she's decided where she stands on something, she's digging her feet in).
I haven't done co-authoring either--it sounds workable for this kind of idea (I assume one of us would do one girl's POV each?), mostly I'm just really unsure if I'm not about to bite off more than I can chew in terms of my time management already.
(If I had good time management it would probably be fine, but I don't, and every time I fool myself into thinking I do... yeah something tends to fall to the wayside. >_> )
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